


Running With Wolves

by waywardrose13



Series: Running With Wolves [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: A/B/O, Alpha!Dean, Assault, Dean Winchester - Freeform, Dean x Reader, Death, F/M, Fanfiction, Language, SPN - Freeform, Supernatural - Freeform, Violence, a/b/o dynamics, dean winchester x reader - Freeform, feral omega, omega!reader
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2019-09-13 18:00:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 13
Words: 36,655
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16897353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/waywardrose13/pseuds/waywardrose13
Summary: She’s never been your typical omega.She’s never fit the stereotypical soft spoken and submissive role. Instead, she’s hot-headed and aggressive, leading people to believe her to be an alpha. “Borderline feral,” she’s called, and she can’t help but wonder if that’s what she’s been battling against her whole life.Being disowned by her own father and looked down upon by society for her biology kept her from allowing people to know she’s an omega. But when she meets her true mate, her secret is revealed, and she no longer feels safe inside her own home.Fast forward a year, Y/N Y/L/N is living peacefully with her alpha and his brother. Her temper had been kept at bay since being mated, and Dean Winchester never expected her to be the omega most alphas saw them to be. But when he breaks her trust, and her heart, she snaps, and the inner ferocity she fought so hard against for years comes to light, and the only thing that can save her from herself is her alpha, the one who betrayed her in the first place.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Also has been posted to my Tumblr and Wattpad pages [waywardrose13].
> 
> Series Warnings: Language, A/B/O dynamics, graphic violence, Feral!Reader, harassment, attempted physical assault, cheating, graphic murder, age-gap, more warnings TBD
> 
> This is a dark series. Please heed warnings and do not read if easily triggered by murder, rape/attempted rape, torture, etc.

I howled at the large shape floating in the sky, its white light casting a glow upon my shimmery skin. The humid air made my shorts and tank top cling to my sweat soaked skin, my hair sticking to my forehead and the back of my neck. Any other person would be uncomfortable in this setting, but not me. I hadn’t even noticed the heat, for I had been wrapped in it for days without the promise of escape. Instead, another howl ripped through my throat, a piercing roar that bounced off the trees and through the leaves, warning other predators that this was my territory.

My hands formed into the claws I once dreaded, the tips gleaming in the moonlight as I finally opened my eyes. The gold was startling, almost moving like a flowing liquid around my iris’. I snarled, teeth bared and sharp, my eyes zoning in on my target, his bewildered and horror stricken face trained on me. Emerald eyes bored into my swirling gold ones, and the sudden rush of anger and adrenaline surged through me. The memories and his words echoed in my head, and a ferocious growl made its way past my lips, making him flinch. Omegas were never paid much mind, never feared. But a feral omega wasn’t a force to be reckoned with. Before he could even think about reaching for his gun, I coiled and pounced, lunging through the air with my sharp claws extended outwards, trained on the throat of my alpha.


	2. Chapter 2

7 years ago

Slender fingers brushed sweat-plastered hair away from my forehead. Soft murmurs were spoken, my mother’s hand in mine as she tried to keep herself together. My skin felt as though it had burst into flames, heat crawling over every inch of my body, my blood boiling in my veins. My eyes were squeezed shut, teeth biting into my bottom lip to keep the whimpers of pain from escaping.

“An omega,” my father’s voice growled from across the room. By body writhed on the bed, stomach cramping painfully as my first heat hit me hard and fast.

“It’s not her fault, Alaric,” my mother said quietly.

“I don’t care if its her fault or not,” my father said. “She’s still an omega. ‘S disgusting.” I winced, my mother’s eyes widening at his words.

“Alaric!” My mother hissed. I grabbed her hand, squeezing it tightly as a particularly bad cramp hit.

“It hurts, Ma,” I whined. She shushed me, running her hand over my head soothingly.

“I know, baby,” she whispered.

“Jesus, Liz. She’s going to have to go through this her whole life,” my father said. “Stop babying her. We need to leave.”

“Why?” Ma snapped. She turned her head, training her dark eyes on my father. “We can’t leave her on her first heat, you know how dangerous the first one can be. She needs us here.”

“No, she doesn’t,” dad said. “What she needs is to be alone. I’m going to go pack a bag. I expect you to be ready to leave soon.” And with that, he left, leaving my mother and I alone.

“Don’t leave me, ma,” I pleaded. “I don’t want to be alone. I don’t want to be an omega.”

“I know, baby.” She cradled me against her chest as if I were a babe, her lips pressing against my sweaty forehead. “Everything will be okay. I promise.”

“Does dad hate me?” I asked. Her heart faltered a bit at that.

“Of course not,” she said quietly.

“He thinks I’m disgusting,” I told her quietly.

“Your father… He doesn’t understand. He doesn’t care for omegas and you know how rare they are.” She swallowed, choosing her next words carefully. “Omegas are looked down upon. They are seen as timid and less respectable than everyone else. You need to be careful, always be aware of alphas. Omegas are seen as the bottom of the social ladder, and they often are not treated as well as they should be. You’ll understand everything a bit more when you’re older, but your father was taught, as were his siblings, that omegas are below alphas, and even betas. He doesn’t hate you. He just doesn’t know how to react to his own daughter presenting as an omega after growing up looking down at them. It’s strange… An Alpha who hates Omegas. I’ve never heard of such a thing.”

“Wasn’t Aunt Gracie an omega?” I questioned. Ma stiffened, gripping me a little tighter.

“Mm hm.”

“Is that why dad doesn’t talk to her anymore?”

Ma hesitated. “… Mm hm.”

I closed my eyes. “Is he going to disown me?”

She took a deep breath. “I hope to God he won’t.”

Present day

I tied the black and green apron around my waist, grabbing the pad and pen before walking out from behind the bar to make my rounds. It was Friday, the busiest night of the week for the bar. The usuals were there, along with a few newcomers and locals. It wasn’t the best job, or the best paying, but I got along okay.

“Hiya, Y/N,” a voice came from behind me. I internally groaned and rolled my eyes, plastering a fake smile on my face as I turned. Alex Walker stood tall and proud, his chest jutted out. He was a typical Alpha and a huge asshole. My scent blockers kept him from finding out I was an Omega, but that didn’t stop him from trying to get in my pants for the last two years.

“Hi, Alex,” I said. I gave him a tight lipped smile and spun back around. His hand reached out and grabbed my arm. I tensed, nostrils flaring at the unwanted touch. He didn’t seem to care. Alphas were at the top of the hierarchy, most of them making that known to Betas and Omegas in ways of intimidation. Alex never tried that with me, but he sure as hell was pushy.

“Have you thought about it?” He asked lowly. He gave me a lopsided smile, blue eyes dark in the low light of the bar.

“Yes,” I said. “And I think I’ll pass.” I tried to walk away again but he gripped me tighter.

“Oh come on, Y/N! Just one night,” he said. “Not everyone gets ‘this’-” he gestured to himself with his free hand, making my brow raise- “and I bet you’ve never been with an Alpha.” His voice lowered again, eyes boring into mine. His scent changed then, making me swallow thickly. I knew what he was doing, and it wouldn’t work, but the Omega in me sure as hell had other ideas, wanting the attention of an Alpha for the first time. “Whaddya say, hm? Let an Alpha take care of you for a night.”

“Alex, let go of me. I said no,” I said harshly. His smirk fell, replaced by an annoyed sneer.

“Fine.” He shoved my arm away from him roughly, making me stumble back a few steps. He stalked off, leaving me confused. Alphas.

Huffing, I straightened my apron and walked over to a table full of Betas with a smile.

“Hey guys. I’m Y/N and I’ll be taking care of you tonight.”

The rest of my shift went by painlessly. I hadn’t seen Alex for the rest of the night. I knew making an Alpha angry was incredibly stupid and risky. Although he, and everyone else, thought I was a Beta, it wouldn’t stop him from trying something. I knew if he knew I was an Omega, the night would have gone by differently.

I hated it. I hated my biology. I hated the painful heats, the shiver that went up my spine when my Alpha boss barked orders at me, my Omega side obeying without question. I hated taking the scent blockers and suppressants, being wary of Alphas. My life had been difficult to begin with, but after presenting as an Omega at the young age of fifteen, it became ten times harder.

I walked home that night. My car had suddenly broken down a few days ago and I didn’t have the money to get it fixed. It wasn’t the safest option, especially right outside a college campus, but what other option was there without spending money I didn’t have on bus tickets?

Summer was fading into fall, the cool air nipping at my ears as I walked. This part of town was quiet, not many cars on the streets at this time on night. I liked the quiet. It was peaceful, and I wasn’t one for cities; too many different scents.

A rumbling engine could be heard off in the distance. Headlights shone up ahead as it turned onto the street, a sleek, black car cruising by. It was a beauty. Older, but in pristine condition. I squinted as it got closer, its lights too bright in my eyes. Classic rock played from the speakers, spilling out of the car through the open windows. As it passed me, a scent did as well. Earthy, like pine and rain, mixed with something sweeter that I could only describe as cinnamon and nutmeg. I sniffed the air, the scent washing over me like a warm blanket, filling my bones and slithering its way into my heart, a shiver running down my spine. I stopped walking, the breeze blowing over me with a touch of a feather, and I sniffed again, closing my eyes, relishing the amazing smell. The car disappeared around a corner, and the smell dissipated, leaving me dazed and stopped in the middle of the sidewalk.

I blinked a few times to clear my head, and continued my walk home, trying to remember exactly what the smell was like.

7 years ago

My heat was unbearable.

It lasted for nearly a week. I had stripped bare of all my clothes, kicking the blankets off my bed, the sheet soaked in my sweat. It was painful and hot, my bones feeling like sandpaper rubbing together. The first few days were when the cramps were the worse and I was shaky and needy. My parents had left the first day, leaving me alone in the house with no idea what was happening to me. The first heats an Omega has after they present can be dangerous, and in worse cases, fatal. Most Omegas don’t know how to handle heats, or what to do to ensure they live through them. Unmated Omegas had them worse, especially early presenters because they were so young.

My fever spiked to dangerous temperatures on the fourth day. I was delirious and in an immense amount of pain. I wasn’t sure what happened, but I found myself in a bathtub full of ice the next day, freezing my ass off, but my temperature had gone down. My father had stayed away, but my mother was too worried and had rushed home when I wasn’t answering the phone. She told me after my heat went down that if she hadn’t come home, I would’ve died.

My father hadn’t returned home after my heat went down for some time. It was nearly a month before he did. Ma wouldn’t tell me anything. I knew it was because of me, and what I had presented as. My mother was a Beta, my father an Alpha, and they were counting on me being a beta like my mother. And with how my father grew up, I knew he didn’t want to come home to his Omega daughter.

“I want you gone, Y/N,” Dad told me. The three of us were sitting around the dining room table, me on one side, my parents on the other. It was the day he returned, and he had called for a family meeting as soon as he walked inside.

“Alaric, please,” Ma said.

“Quiet, Liz,” Dad snapped. She closed her mouth, looking down at the table. Dad was the Alpha, and even if she wasn’t an Omega, she was always submissive to him. It confused me for a long time, why she would choose to be that way. But I never questioned it, knowing not to ask those types of questions, especially when it came to someone’s biology.

“Where do I go?” I asked. I bit my lip, trying to keep the tears at bay.

“I don’t know, and frankly, I don’t care,” he said. “As far as I know, you are not my daughter anymore. I can’t have an Omega daughter.”

“Alaric, please!” Ma said. He shushed her, not breaking eye contact from me.

“I can’t have an Omega who will be in heat every month living here. I won’t be sent away from my own home so you can do…. Whatever it is that Omegas need done. I won’t pay for scent blockers or suppressants. I won’t have a daughter who is timid and weak. The guys at work won’t be able to come over here anymore because of the Omega temptation. You’re going to make your mother and my life so much harder. So you can go find an Alpha for yourself.”

“But I don’t want to go. I need my parents,” I whispered, my tears disobeying me. I looked over to my mother. “Ma, please don’t let him do this. Please. I need my mom.”

“I’m sorry, baby,” she said. She got up from the table and rushed upstairs, her hand over her mouth to stifle her cries.

“Dad, please-”

“I’m no longer your dad. I expect you to be gone in the next hour. I wish you good luck in life, Y/N,” he said. He stood up to follow my mother upstairs. “But if you try to find or contact us, I won’t be as kind as I am now.”

He disappeared up the stairs, leaving me hurt and confused. I had nowhere to go, nor any idea what to do on my own. I was fifteen and a newly presented Omega. I was terrified, but I didn’t want to see my father angry. I’d seen the bruises on my mother before when she had stepped out of line, and she’s my father’s mate. I couldn’t imagine what he’d do to an Omega who disobeyed him, even if they were his own child.

Present day

I had pushed the memory of the scent from last night to the back of my mind. I had a few classes today before work and I didn’t need the distraction.

I kept hoping I’d see that car again, or smell the scent again. It felt like home, like it was a scent made for me. But I had no such luck.

I immediately was done with work the minute I walked inside the bar. I had an earlier shift than yesterday, but it was longer. I was covering for another girl so I took her late shift. I was hoping I wouldn’t have to deal with Alex until later, but the bastard was sitting in his usual spot, looking up at me with a smug smile as soon as I walked in.

I ignored him, walking behind the bar and grabbing my apron.

“I saw what happened with Alex yesterday,” Tommy said, walking up to lean against the bar beside me. “If you need me to throw him out, I will.”

“Thanks, boss,” I said tying my apron. “I think I can handle it though. If he touches me again, I won’t hesitate to knock him on his ass.”

Tommy snickered. “You sure you’re not an Alpha, huh?”

“Nah, but I bite like one,” I said. I sent a playful wink his way, making him chuckle.

“You sure are something, Y/L/N,” Tommy said smiling. He sighed, batting his eyes flirtingly. “If only I wasn’t your boss.”

“If only you weren’t gay,” I bit back. His smile widened. “How is Andy?”

“He’s fine. How’s your mate? Oh wait… You don’t have one.” He gave me a dramatic frown, my eyes rolling.

“Ha ha, very funny,” I deadpanned.

“Alright, get your ass out there,” He said, swiping the towel at me. I dodged it, grabbing my pad and pen.

“Yeah, yeah.”

I ran on autopilot, serving tables and taking orders without much thought. I was lost in my own mind, too wrapped up in the memory of the scent from the night before. It was strange, how drawn I was to a scent. But it smelled like home, like it was a scent made for me. Mine.

I flinched at that. I wasn’t sure where that came from, but it sure as hell didn’t make any sense. True mates were something unheard of. The probability of an Omega and an Alpha finding their true mate was incredibly low. You would hear it sometimes on the news, or see it in magazines, that a pair had found each other. The likeness of me finding my true mate was next to none, and with all the suppressants and scent blockers I was doped up on, I doubted my true mate would even be able to scent me.

I tried to shake the thought off, but I couldn’t help but wonder. Maybe I had missed my chance. Maybe the Alpha just so happened to be cruising through town, and I had missed the shot. But I knew how rare true mates were, and if anyone was lucky to find theirs, it certainly wouldn’t be me. Not with my luck.

“Hiya, Y/N.” I groaned, this time out load. Spinning on my heel, I glared at Alex.

“The hell do you want?” I growled. He looked a little taken back at the authority in my voice, doing a quick once over to size me up. His brow raised slightly in silent question, his nostrils flaring as sniffed the air, trying to catch my scent- again.

“I… Well…

“I don’t have time for another night of your sexual harassment and I sure don’t have time for your bullshit.”

“What the fuck is your problem?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at me.

“You… Are my problem, you arrogant dick.” I pressed my hand down on the table, leaning forward a bit. “Now leave me the hell alone.”

“You’re an Alpha… Aren’t you,” he said slowly, not questioning it. He scoffed, leaning back and rolling his eyes to the ceiling. “Figures.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked.

“No wonder you’re so temperamental and aggressive,” he said. “If you were an Omega, I’d think you were borderline feral.”

I flinched again. I had been told that before, by my Omega roommate early in my college years. I had snapped at a guy who tried to put his hands on me, scaring the living shit out of her and the guy. I had a temper Omegas didn’t usually have, I was aggressive when threatened and scared. Omegas who went feral could either gradually build up to it and finally snap, or something could happen to make them do so immediately. It’s incredibly rare, nearly impossible for it to happen, but it can. I wasn’t feral, and I was sure I would never be so, but the signs of growing ferality were hard to ignore. I tried to, but I knew an Omega’s personality wasn’t like mine whatsoever. I did have some traits of an Omega. I was usually soft spoken, unless threatened or angry. I was emotional and sensitive, usually only letting it show when I’m alone though. And I’m not the strongest person in the world, not by a long shot.

“Well,” I said, pushing up off the table. “I appreciate your observations but I’ve got work to do.” He clenched his jaw as I gave him a snarky smile and stalked off. It was risky messing with an Alpha, one who thought I was, too, an Alpha, but I knew if worse came to worse, Tommy wouldn’t bat an eyelid to help.

I was setting down the pad onto the counter when the door opened. I didn’t bother looking, not that I needed to, and poured myself a much needed shot of whisky. I glance around, making sure no one was watching, and downed it easily. I sighed as the burn warmed my throat and soothed my anger, dissipating the fire into a dull flame. I set the glass down as I saw Tommy walking towards me out of the corner of my eye. I was about to grab the pad and pen again, but then I smelled it. The scent I had smelled yesterday; pine and rain, cinnamon and nutmeg. I could catch more of it now, it was stronger than before. The distinct leather and apple smell washed over me, mixing with the ones I had already memorized. My eyes fluttered closed as I breathed deeply through my nose, my head tilting back as I felt my bones heat up, a bead of sweat forming on the back of my neck.

I opened my eyes, searching the bar for any sign of the smell. I was drawn to it, completely and utterly captivated. I faintly heard Tommy saying my name, saw out of the corner of my eye, his hand waving towards me to get my attention. But I didn’t notice. No. I was trained on the bar, desperately searching for the cause of the smell that had my body reacting in a way it never had before. When Tommy touched my shoulder, I growled under my breath, deep in my chest it rumbled, causing him to back away. I moved around from the counter, my features softening again as I focused on the smell instead, letting it soothe and calm me.

I walked through the bar, maneuvering around people who were standing and walking by me. I moved automatically, almost feeling a slight tug on my heart in the right direction.

And then I found it. Or rather, him. The source of the scent. His back was to me, but I could make out the tall figure and broad shoulders. He was wide-set, obviously very muscular under the jacket he was wearing. Bow legs clad in jeans, brown boots turning a bit as he did. I looked up at his head, his sandy brown hair borderline blond.

And finally, he turned towards me, his nose flared as he sniffed again, eyes meeting mine. They were like emeralds, shining in the low light of the bar as they stared at me, holding me in their gaze as he took cautious steps forward, hand turning slightly to almost extend out towards me. I swallowed thickly, my chin tilting up so I could see into his eyes as he was finally chest to chest with me. His hand raised, slowly, gently placing it against my jaw and moving it up to cup my cheek. He nudged his thumb, my head moving automatically to grant him access to my neck. He bent down, his nose brushing against my skin with the touch of a feather, breathing deeply, scenting me.

I was putty in his hands. I now understood what Omegas had said about submitting so easily to their Alphas, feeling a pull like no other towards their mate. But the difference between them and me, was that I wasn’t mated. I had never met this Alpha my whole life, yet the pull was so strong, I could feel my heart swelling in his presence, an invisible string pulling my heart to his, tethering us together. I knew then, that I was screwed. I had never been this vulnerable with an Alpha. I had never even allowed one to touch me, let alone scent me. But my body had melted against his, hands gripped onto his biceps and eyes closed as I relished in his warm touch, small bolts of electricity jolting through me as his fingertips dug softly into the back of my neck.

A cramp hit me forcefully, catching me off guard. I whimpered, and suddenly, all eyes that weren’t already on us, were turning, trying to catch a glimpse of the smell they now all were catching. My knees buckled at the pain, and the Alpha quickly wrapped his arms around my waist, holding me close to him, his nose still pressed against me. His hair tickled my cheek as he nuzzled my neck, and I could feel my body breaking out into a sweat, already uncomfortable in my own skin.

The Alpha had triggered my heat. I wasn’t due for a while, and there was only one instance I knew of where an Omega’s heat could spontaneously trigger. I whimpered, a low cry passing my lips as the most painful cramp I’d ever had ripped through me, my legs going limp. The Alpha shushed me quietly, his hand running soothingly through my hair.

“It’s alright, Omega,” he whispered. His voice was husky, but sweet, and dripped with earnesty; genuine concern in his words. “I’ll take care of you. Promise.”

“Holy shit,” a voice said behind me. The small crowd backed away, Alex walking up behind me. The Alpha raised his head, and I gripped his jacket in my hands to keep myself upright, turning my head just enough to see him. His blue eyes were dark with lust, the scent of an Omega in heat setting him off. The scent blockers weren’t working, but this wasn’t an ordinary heat. And now my cover was blown. “Y/N Y/L/N. A fucking Omega bitch.”

The Alpha’s arms tightened around me, a vicious snarl ripping from his mouth at Alex’s words.

Alex simply laughed. “Oh, buddy. Trust me. She let me believe she was an Alpha. It was kinda hard to not believe it, seeing as how bat-shit crazy she is. You ask her out a few times, offer a good time, and she threatens you. Imagine what will happen if you knot her-” The Alpha hissed- “I’m telling you, she’s going feral. The bitch will snap at some point.”

The Alpha roared, growling at the other Alpha ferociously. I squeezed my eyes shut as another riptide of pain washed over me, and I slumped against him. He glanced down at me for a moment before picking me up into his arms bridal style. His lips was curled back over his teeth, baring them at Alex. The smaller man visibly gulped as the Alpha stood his full height.

Tommy took that moment to step in.

“Okay, settle down here, gentlemen,” he said. “Now, if you would be so kind as to set down the girl… Let’s talk about this in the back, okay?”

The Alpha took a few steps to the side, closer to the door. He growled again, making the other two flinch.

“Mine.” Was all he said before he swiftly moved out of the bar and into the night, his arms holding me tightly to his chest.


	3. Chapter 3

I clung to the alpha’s jacket, sweat beading on my forehead as fire erupted from under my skin. He hadn’t said a word, swiftly carrying me through the parking lot and to a car. I was too dazed and wrapped up in my own heat to get a good look at it, or even protest to being put into a stranger’s car, and curled up in the front seat he place me in. I could vaguely hear shouting outside the car, my eyes fluttering a bit to catch a glimpse of the alpha and an even taller man yelling at each other outside, the alpha growling and pushing the other man back as he opened the driver’s door.

“Mine,” he snarled, shutting the door quickly in the man’s face and peeling out of the parking lot. Another forceful cramp hit me, and I groaned, my arms wrapping around my torso as pain ripped through my body. My clothes clung to my damp skin, making me even more uncomfortable than I already was. I could feel the alpha’s eyes glance at me periodically, but I barely noticed. My hands fumbled with my flannel, buttons being clumsily slipped out of their holes and the fabric was slipped from my shoulders. I wasn’t thinking much as the heat drove me mad, my hands stripping my undershirt off to leave me in a bra and jeans. The alpha finally placed a hand over my fumbling fingers as they messed with the button of my jeans. I whined at the contact, my body reacting to his touch on its own accord.

“Patience, omega,” he said softly, voice husky and warm like whiskey. His voice now a stark contrast from the bar, slow and soft; kind and gentle as he shushed me. I whimpered, crying out as a cramp hit me hard.

“Please, alpha,” I panted, writhing on the leather. “It hurts.”

“I know, omega. I know. We’re almost there,” he assured me, his hand moving back to the steering wheel. His body was tense, his self control amazing. An omega, his omega, in heat beside him, and he was keeping himself together rather well. I, on the other hand, felt as though I was going to burst into flames, my thighs rubbing together to try and soothe the growing ache between them.

After what felt like hours, the alpha stopped the car, getting out quickly and rounding to my side, lifting me with ease and stalked across the parking lot, pushing open a door and walking into a room.

He placed me on to a bed. It wasn’t overly comfortable, but it was good enough that I could stretch out on, my body twitching and writhing in discomfort. I could hear the door lock and the deadbolt be put into place, the distinct sound of a belt being undone making me realize that the alpha was a stranger, anxiety bubbling deep within me. The thought that I have never done this hadn’t crossed my mind yet, and I debated on whether or not to tell him. If I did, he may stop, and I fucking needed this. But the nerves were undeniable, and as I heard him take off his shoes and jeans, the reality of it all set in. I had never wanted to do this before now, the fear of an alpha claiming me or a beta spilling the beans that I was an omega too strong. But this was the strongest heat I’d ever had, and the fucking adonis undressing mere five feet from me made me want it now more than ever. There were questions, sure, but luckily I knew the aspects of it. I knew he was my true mate, and even though I was buzzing with nerves, I wouldn’t want it to be anyone else.

He crawled up the bed, aiding in my fruitless attempts to get my jeans off. He took off my shoes and socks, slipping the denim over my ankles and tossing it behind him. I panted and squirmed, my hand traveling unconsciously down, fingers beginning to poke under my panties when a hand caught mine.

“I’ve got you, ‘mega,” the alpha whispered, bringing my hand up to kiss my fingertips, one by one. “What’s your name, pretty girl?”

“Y/N,” I said breathlessly. He hummed, his other hand running up my side with the touch of a feather, making me shiver. 

“I’m Dean,” he said slowly, knowing I wasn’t quite in the right headspace to listen. My eyes were closed, hands blindly reaching out for him.

“Alpha,” I pleaded.

“What’s your last name?” He murmured. I groaned in frustration.

“Y/L/N,” I said.

“Y/N Y/L/N,” he said slowly, testing it on his tongue. He bent down again, scenting my neck. He moaned, hands tightening a bit on my waist as he placed a kiss to my neck.

“How old are you, ‘mega?” He asked, fingertips running over my cheek as he pulled back. I nuzzled his hand, leg lifting to wrap around his waist, hips bucking to rub against him.

“Please.”

“Answer the question,” he said.

“Twenty-three,” I grunted, impatient. I felt him stiffen for a moment, relaxing as I ran my hand up the side of his neck. “Now please… Take the pain away.”

His hand cupped my cheek, my eyes opening to lock with his emerald ones. He gave me a gentle smile, leaning down and pressing his lips softly to mine.

Seven Years Ago

I packed quickly, taking the absolute necessities. Clothes, my money stash, medicine and some of my favorite books. I picked up the thin rope bracelet on my dresser, enclosing it in my fist before taking a glance around my room. It wasn’t completely bare, but it was plain. Simple paintings inhabiting the cream walls, a black and white floral bedspread the only truly decorative thing in the room. My father never allowed such things like posters and colored walls. He wanted simple and elegant, a room that could fit a beta. A beta who never came to be.

I distinctly heard my father’s voice, loud and angry down the hallway. I gently shut my door behind me, looking to my right at my parent’s room.

“She’s a fucking omega! Do you know how this will affect me? Us? We’ll be the laughing stock of the town!” Dad yelled.

“She’s our daughter, Alaric. How can you throw her out on the street? An omega… alone. What the hell is wrong with you?”

I flinched at the sound of skin hitting skin. Closing my eyes, I wavered on my feet, teetering on the edge of running outside, and running to my mother. I clenched my jaw as a sudden burst of anger surged through me. A rage that unbeknownst to me, sparked a growing rage that would lead to future consequences.

“You will not speak to me that way,” he hissed. My mother didn’t reply, the lock on their door echoing softly as it turned, the knob jiggling. Swallowing hard, I sprinted down the stairs, knowing my father was expecting me gone. Dashing towards the front door, I bent down and picked up my tennis shoes, slipping them on as quickly as I could, dad’s steps down the stairs matching my crashing heart in my chest.

His eyes met mine as I stood up from tying my second shoe, both frozen in our places. His jaw ticked, the creak on the stairs letting us both know my mother has joined us.

“Can I say goodbye to her?” I asked. His lip twitched.

“No,” he said slowly. “You’re supposed to be gone already.”

“Right.” I nodded bitterly, giving him a smirk. “Because my presence will affect you, right? I’ll cause you to be the laughing stock of the town?” I chuckled darkly, eyes narrowing. He almost flinched at the look I was giving him, confusion and utter fear crossing his face. My eyes flickered to the stairs briefly before meeting his again. “I’m not sure I want to be living under the roof of an alpha who’s too wrapped up in his own self image and egotistical mind to care about his own daughter.” His bows raised. “An alpha more concerned with himself than his pack isn’t fit to be, well… the alpha.”

“What did you just say?” He asked lowly, stalking towards me slowly. I stood my ground, not fazed by his angered look, or the way his hand raised in preparation to strike me.

My eyes looked down at his hand, another dour chuckle slipping past my lips, making him stop in his tracks. I locked eyes with him once more, shoulders straightening as I said my final words to my father.

“I wouldn’t try that if I were you,” I said, head tilting a bit. “I wouldn’t be afraid to fight back. I’m not your daughter anymore, remember?” I felt my nails sharpen a bit at my words, a threatening scent spilling from me, my father stiffening at the sudden change. He could feel it, feel my anger and the strange energy rolling off me. An energy and rage omegas didn’t have, something that scared him. “So hit me, I strike. Unlike Ma, I ain’t your bitch.”

And with that, I opened the door, stepping out into the sunlight, leaving my parents behind without another look.

Present Day

I felt heavy.

I was naked, my hands braced on the dingy motel room bathroom sink, head down and eyes closed. Waking up next to a body- a stranger- for the first time in my life was beyond nerve racking. Finding my true mate was even more so. My eyes flickered up to the mirror, locking on the claim that had been laid less than ten hours ago. 

I growled lowly, fist raising and punching the glass with such ferocity, it cracked and shattered, little shards raining down on the ceramic. I never wanted to be claimed. I never wanted an alpha. My mother’s words had rung in my head since I presented, the constant warning of alphas keeping me wary and distant. I refused to even get close to betas. But now I was tied to an alpha whom I just met, one I knew nothing about. I had already given a piece of myself to him, but I didn’t think he’d fucking claim me.

The door burst open, the alpha’s eyes wide and searching, a gun in his hand. I cringed away from it, scrunching up my face at the intrusion. I grabbed the robe hanging on the rack, slipping into it as he simply stared at the mirror.

“What the fuck?” He asked, looking down at me. My face was blank, but my eyes were hard, staring into emerald ones filled with confusion. “I thought you were hurt.”

“Nope,” I said. He nodded, running a hand through his hair.

“Why… Why did you break the mirror?” He asked. It was then that I noticed he was still bare, his fucking junk out for me to see in the morning light. He didn’t seem fazed by that fact, obviously very comfortable around me already. I, however, wasn’t.

“I was angry,” I said simply. I moved around him, doing the best I could not to touch him. He watched me, a puzzled expression on his face. I looked around the room for my clothes, finding them and picking them up, realizing my flannel and undershirt were still in his car.

And then another cramp hit.

I grunted, hand flying out to land on the headboard of the bed, eyes closing as I took a deep breath. I had been fine this morning, last night’s events keeping my heat at bay. But now the wave was coming back.

“Hey, hey,” Dean said softly, rushing to my side. I flinched as he got closer, and he recoiled immediately.

“Don’t… don’t touch me,” I said.

“What is going on?” He asked. “You were so… different last night.”

“Yeah, heat does that to you,” I snapped.

“The fuck is your problem?” He asked harshly.

I winced as I stood up straight, hand flying to my abdomen as another cramp hit. “You fucking claimed me last night.”

“Okay… and?” He raised a brow.

“You don’t see the problem with that?” I yelled. “We don’t know each other!”

“You’re my true mate!” He said. “Who the fuck else would claim you? Do you have someone else?”

“I… No,” I said.

“So what’s the problem?” He shook his head. He smiled a bit, walking forward again. He reached for me, and this time I let him take my hands in his, fingers gently lacing with mine. “Look, I never wanted to claim anyone. Ever. But I never thought I’d meet my true mate. The person I was supposed to be with. And last night, I swear, I wanted to wait. But the time came and I couldn’t help myself.” His eyes locked on the mark on my neck, his fingers reaching up to brush over it softly. “The life I live… It’s a dangerous one and I never would want to drag anyone into it. But if you’re my true mate, it means someone thinks you’re strong enough to handle it. And honestly, I could use something good in my life right now.”

I bit my lip, mulling over his words. He was right. I didn’t have anyone else, nor have I ever. Last night was the first glimpse I’ve ever had at the passion and emotions between two people. And even though I had just met Dean, I knew I wouldn’t want to leave him, even if he hadn’t claimed me. Being in his presence, I felt complete, like a part of me had been filled that I had been missing. I had been angry, furious, about being claimed. But his words had reassured me, made my heart swell just a bit. I smiled smally at him, embarrassed about how I had acted earlier. But I couldn’t control myself; the anger I seemed to always have. It seemed I was never able to.

I cringed and moaned in discomfort as the pain grew in my belly, my skin starting to itch and sweat. I lifted my chin, tilting my head a bit so my mark was clearer. I pressed myself against Dean, hands running up his bare chest to lock around his neck, my nose reaching to press against his throat.

“Alpha,” I whispered. He growled at his title, his arms wrapping tightly around me, lifting me up until my lips met his. He carried me to the bed, tongue licking into my mouth, lips soft but harsh against mine. Dropping me onto the mattress, he broke away, unceremoniously ripping the robe open to expose me. I writhed on the bed with need, skin flushing both from the heat and embarrassment from being so… bare. He could feel the uneasiness rolling off me, his lips dipping to kiss my stomach, moving up to the canal between my breasts, finally landing on his claim mark.

“Have I told you how beautiful you are?” He said lowly, hands running down my sides to rest on my waist. He rolled his hips against mine, his hot member heavy and hard, making me gasp as it bumped my core.

“I… I don’t think so,” I said honestly, barely remembering anything from last night. He chuckled, pressing his lips to mine again, one of his hands traveling further south. His fingers danced across my pelvic bone for a moment, the increasing nerves bubbling inside me once more, worse than last night, not as delirious from heat now. They dipped lower, running up and down, pressing on the small bundle of nerves, making me jerk in his hold.

“Well then,” he whispered. He shuffled down the bed, giving me a lewd smile before pressing a kiss to my hip. “I guess I’m just going to hafta show you, hm?”

Seven Years Ago

My feet were killing me.

I was nearly across town now, halfway through the thicket of woods. It was the only place I could think of to go. The only place that I wouldn’t be kicked out of.

When the house finally came into view, I nearly sobbed with joy. Ignoring my aching feet, I ran, hoisting my bag higher on my shoulder. Just the mere sight of it brought a wash of calm and relief over me.

It was older. A southern farmhouse in a field past the woods of my small hometown. It was white with black shutters, a wrap around porch decorated with hanging pots of yellow and pink flowers. The steps leading up to the porch were old and cracked in places, much like the rest of the house, but it still had the familiar smell and feel of home and love.

I raised my fist and knocked on the door, hoping she hadn’t already gone to her Thursday meetings at the church. The cool wind blew my hair over my shoulder, the small swinging bench rocking lightly, the old chains squeaking loudly. I sighed, moving to peer into one of the windows. I could see the lowly lit sitting room and its hideously floral decorated walls, the open book and glass of water on the small table beside the ottoman chair.

I moved back to the door, about to knock, when it opened. The salt and pepper haired woman I was dying to open the door smiled warmly at me, her gray eyes kind.

“Why, Y/N,” she said, a hint of a laugh in her words. “What brings you out here?”

My smile faltered, brows furrowing. “He kicked me out, Ellie-” her eyes widened- “because I’m an omega.”

She swallowed thickly, pushing open the screen door and beckoning me inside. Sympathy was written across her face, her arms instantly wrapping themselves around me.

“Oh, my dear,” she said sadly. “My poor dear.”

I hugged her tightly, the familiar lemongrass and chamomile scent washing over me. She patted my back, pulling away to guide me into the kitchen.

“Won’t you have a slice of pie, Y/N?” She asked, motioning for me to sit at the breakfast table. I laughed softly, dropping my bag and complying, smiling at her as she set a plate with a slice of cherry pie in front of me.

“You don’t care that I’m… I’m an omega?” I asked, picking up my fork. She sat in the chair beside me, smoothing the tablecloth over round wood.

“No,” she said after a moment. She looked up at me, giving me a smile. “You know I wouldn’t. That’s why you came here.”

I let a short breath out of my nose, my lip twitching. Her hand landed on my knee, patting it gently.

“I’ll always be here, Y/N,” she said.

“I can’t stay here, Eleanor,” I said slowly. “It’s dangerous for you.”

“That’s rubbish,” she said, rolling her eyes. “I’ve lived a full life, Y/N. I’m nearly eighty years old now. I don’t want you worrying about me.”

“If someone catches a whiff of me when my heat hits-”

“We’re too far away for that,” she said.

“God forbid someone sees me and tells my father.” I ignored her. “It’s just not safe, Ellie. Besides, you know how omegas are seen. What happens when people in town find out you’re housing one? Not only will they think less of you, but alphas could come here. And then you’d be caught in the crossfire.”

“Then why’d you come here?” She asked. There wasn’t a hint of anger or annoyance, simply curiosity.

“I dunno,” I said. I furrowed my brows, eyes trained on the table. “I guess I needed some place to regroup. To think things through. I needed somewhere safe.”

“Well,” she said, standing up. “You’re always safe here.” She got up to cover the pie, her lips pursed in thought. “I know you won’t stay long, but whenever you need somewhere to go, somewhere to feel safe again.” She looked back at me, a gentle smile gracing her features again. “You always will be welcomed here.”

Present Day

It was mid day when I woke again.

A fist was pounding at the door, annoyed huffs coming from outside. I lifted my head, confused.

“Dean!” A voice called. It was male, deep but not as deep as Dean’s. I looked over my shoulder at the alpha sleeping behind me, his arm still draped across my waist. I sniffed the air, smelling the scent I had been drawn to just two nights ago, and another, more unfamiliar one. It was similar to Dean’s, but wasn’t as attractive. It was slightly bitter and smelled more like any other alpha I had come across.

Sighing, I rolled out of bed, the alpha grunting at the loss of me under his arm. I smiled a bit at that, picking up his discarded flannel and my jeans. I slipped them on quickly, finishing up the buttons on the flannel as I unlocked the door, opening it a crack.

“De- oh.” The man took a step back, blinking a few times and looking down awkwardly. He was tall, even taller than Dean. His hair was a darker brown than my alpha’s, longer too, nearly to his shoulders. He looked intimidating with his width and height, but his hazel eyes were soft. “Is uh… Is Dean in there?”

I narrowed my eyes, tilting my head a bit. “Who are you?”

“His brother,” he said. “Sam.”

Dean hadn’t mentioned a brother, but now that I thought about it, the alpha in front of me sounded much like the man who Dean had been arguing with at the bar the night before. I swallowed thickly, glancing over my shoulder at the man who was beginning to rouse.

“Oh,” I said turning back to the tall alpha. I looked up to meet his eyes, but they were looking down at me, or rather, my neck. His brows were shot up, eyes wide as they stared at my skin where my hair had fallen away from. My hand automatically raised to hide it, his eyes then flickering to me.

“I… Dean… What…” He stuttered, trying to come up with words. Instead, he clamped his mouth shut, eyes blinking rapidly.

“Sam?” Dean’s voice said behind me. His body pressed into my back, his arm curling around my waist. Sam’s eyes flickered down to where he held me, and then to Dean, and then back to me.

“Okay, what the fuck?” Sam blurted. Dean let out a long sigh, stepping out of the way. He brought me with him, pushing open the door enough for the newcomer to step in.

“Come on, Sam,” Dean said. “We’ve got some explaining to do.”

“Yeah, you think?” Sam asked walking into the room. He automatically flinched, nostrils flaring at the smell of sex and an omega in heat. His head snapped to me, Dean’s arm tightening as a growl ripped from his chest.

“Mine,” Dean snarled, Sam taking a few steps back with his hands outstretched in defense.

“Hey, hey, hey,” he said. “Calm down. I’m not going to do anything.”

Dean’s arm tightened even more, his thumb rubbing slow circles on my torso. He stood tall, eyeing Sam warily.

“She’s mine, Sam,” he said.

Sam nodded slowly, giving Dean a confused look. “Yeah, you said that.”

“No. I mean, she’s mine, Sam.” I glanced up at Dean, watching as he tilted his head a bit, pursing his lips.

Sam was puzzled, his face scrunching up. His eyes looked between the two of us, eyes widening when he understood. “Oh, oh. So, like… You mean, she’s your…”

“Yeah,” Dean said.

Sam smiled. He raised his hands a bit, letting them fall back to his sides. “This… This is awesome, Dean! Congratulations!” He looked down at me. “And you, too…”

“Y/N,” I said. His smile widened.

“Y/N.” He took a few steps forward, gauging Dean’s reaction before holding out his hand. “I’m Sam Winchester, Dean’s younger brother.”

I shook his hand, giving him a smile of my own. “Y/N Y/L/N.”

Sam took a few steps back, his nose wrinkling again. I bit my lip to hold back my laugh as he glanced around the room for a moment.

“Look, how about we pack up and we can get back to the bunker,” Dean said. “We’ll meet you at the diner a few blocks down.”

Sam nodded. “Yeah, good idea. I’ll see you guys later.” He gave us both another smile, giving the room one last look and bolted from the room, no doubt uncomfortable with the scent of an omega in heat.

“How’re you feeling?” Dean asked, turning to me. His hands cupped my waist, eyes sincere.

“I’m okay,” I said honestly. “A bit dizzy but no pain yet.”

“We don’t have to go eat if you don’t want to. There’ll probably be other alphas there and I don’t want you to be afraid. But, I’ll be there obviously. I’ll protect you.”

I smirked. “I’ve been alone for the past seven and a half years as an omega, Dean. I’ve never needed protecting before.”

“Have you ever been out alone while in heat?” He asked, raising a brow.

“I… Once.” I furrowed my brows, looking away. “Wasn’t a great experience.”

He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear, hand tightening. “Did someone…”

“No,” I said looking back at him. “They tried.”

He nodded, leaning forward to kiss my forehead. “Well, you’ve got me now, sweetheart. I won’t let anything happen to you, even if you don’t need my protection.”

I cupped his cheeks, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “What’s the bunker?”

He smiled. “It’s where Sam and I live. It’s like the bat cave.” His lip twisted up into a sour look. “I’ve got a lot of stuff to tell you that you just gotta trust me on.”

I raised a brow. “Okay?” He backed away and turned, picking up his discarded clothes and headed towards the small table where a duffel bag sat. “You said ‘we’. Does that mean I’m coming too?”

He stopped what he was doing, turning his head a bit. “Do you not want to?”

“No, I do. I just… where exactly are we going? Where are you taking me?” He turned to face me fully, a warm, gentle smile on his face.

“Home,” he said. “I’m taking you home, Y/N.”


	4. Chapter 4

I fumbled with my keys, suddenly nervous to let Dean into my tiny apartment. After he had told me about the bunker, I didn’t think much of it. Only that I, of course, would go with him. But I failed to remember my classes and own apartment.

I pushed open the door, letting him in and then closing it behind him. I ignored the formalities, too wrapped up in my own mind to show him around.

It was an open floor plan. A small office cluttered with papers, textbooks and pens was directly off to the left, the kitchen on the right. The marble countertops were sleek and tidy, the barstools arranged neatly and set equally apart. The living room had one couch, a small television and a window making up most of the west wall. My bedroom was towards the back, the only bathroom to the right in the room.

Dean followed me curiously, watching closely as I grabbed a bag from under my bed and set it onto my dresser, opening drawers and shoving the small amount of clothes I had into it.

I didn’t take everything from my room, just the necessities. Dean went over and sat on my bed, scooting up to rest against my headboard. His eyes drifted towards the window, the clouds rolling in over the sky, creating a thick blanket of gray. I looked at him closely, heart beating a little faster at the realization that he was mine. There was no denying that he was absolutely gorgeous, or that he was the sweetest alpha I’d ever met. The whole car ride here was full of questions about my life and his, the greenest of eyes full of warmth whenever he looked at me. He was worried about my heat, but I reassured him it wasn’t bad now. It didn’t stop the worried glances my way, however.

I flitted around the room, filling my bag quickly and efficiently. But when I made my way over to the nightstand to grab my suppressants and scent blockers, Dean’s eyes turned to mine, his hand reaching out to grab my arm. 

“You won’t be needing those anymore,” he said. His eyes were soft, but his tone was hard, jaw set firmly. 

“Excuse me?” 

“I will take care of you now. You won’t need the suppressants anymore. And now that you’re claimed, your scent will be changed,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You won’t have to worry about that.”

“I… I’m taking them with me,” I said, snatching my hand away. I grabbed the bottles quickly, shoving them deep into my bag before turning away from him, walking over to my dresser again. I heard the bed springs whine, and his feet thump softly on the floor. He reached around me, groping for the bag but I pushed it out of his way. 

“I’m serious, Dean,” I said firmly.

“As am I, omega,” he said lowly. I stiffened, hand loosening a bit on the bag. I wavered a bit as his hand gripped my hip tightly, fingers digging into my skin. “Give me the pills.”

I swallowed. “No.”

He growled. I could feel the anger vibrating from him, feel his mood change. It was something I always wondered about claimed couples. Tommy had said that he and Andy could feel each other’s moods, or changes thereof. I wondered how that worked, or how it felt. But with the way my claim mark was burning like angry fire, how my veins felt jittery and frustrated, I understood.

What he didn’t expect, was for me to growl back. He blinked a few times in confusion, watching as my eyes blinked gold for a split second. It had happened a few times in my life. I knew it wasn’t normal, but I never thought much of it.

“Just because you’re my alpha doesn’t mean you get to tell me what to do. I’m bringing them and I don’t need to explain myself to you,” I said. I jerked away from him, zipping up the bag and switching the lamp off, marching out into the apartment. He stared after me, dumbstruck. He began to take small steps forward, following me into my office. I grabbed my laptop and charger, slipping it into my briefcase before grabbing a couple of my textbooks. I glanced up at him, setting my jaw as I watched his face. He looked angry, and by the way his chest was puffed out, I could easily tell he was trying to make me feel smaller. I ignored him, however, shutting off the light and walking to the door. 

“We going or not?”

Seven years ago

It had been nearly three months since I showed up at Eleanor’s house.

I had stayed hidden, riding out my heats painfully and on my own inside the guest room Eleanor had assigned me. She’d keep her distance those days, but she’d check in every now and then, making sure the temperature hadn’t killed me. Younger omegas were at a much lower risk for dying during heats, but it wasn’t impossible.

During those three months, I had been trying to pull myself together. I slowly but surely had been collecting supplies. Alaric no doubt had eyes around town, messengers that would report to him if he saw me or not. Because of this, we also didn’t want to raise suspicion. I would give Eleanor money and a small list every two weeks, a list containing things I would need for when I took off. She never said anything about me leaving, however. I think she enjoyed the company. 

Eleanor Whitby was a soft, kind old woman. I would spend my summer days as a young child with her while my parents were at work. She was a grandmother figure to me, someone who I grew to love very much. She was a beta, one who married another beta in the late fifties. She and Abraham had a daughter, Adeline. She died very young, and Abe used to tell me Eleanor wasn’t the same after that. But when I would come play in the fields, catching butterflies and lightning bugs in the evening, singing in the kitchen will baking cookies with her, Abe said he saw a little of who she used to be. After he died, Eleanor had retired from the school and maintained a quiet life in her farmhouse. She seemed content now a days, and I hoped my presence wouldn’t ruin it.

When she came home one day, lips pursed into a sour look and brows furrowed, I knew something was wrong.

“What is it, Ellie?” I asked. She set the bag down on the breakfast table, taking a seat across from me.

“Your father,” she murmured. “I ran into him. He saw a few things I was picking up.” She looked up at me, a frown on her face. “I think he’s suspicious.”

I swallowed thickly, my heart beginning to race. I should have known something would happen soon. It was too quiet. 

I grabbed the bag and got out of the chair, Eleanor’s eyes following me as I moved towards the stairs. 

“What are you doing?” She asked. She followed me up to the spare bedroom I had been staying in.

“Leaving.” I grabbed my duffel from the small dresser, stuffing the small amount of clothes I had into it, following that with my few personal belongings. Eleanor watched me carefully, sad eyes trained on my every move. She looked so small and frail, so fragile. I then realized the mistake it was by coming here. She was the last person I had left, I had put her into a danger I had been trying to avoid. 

I grabbed the gray backpack she had picked up for me a few weeks ago, stuffing it with the things I had put on the lists- a hunting knife, various freeze dried fruits, flashlights, batteries, a small radio, and a few other essentials. My eyes trained on the small medicine bottles. I picked them up gently, the pills rattling inside. The sound made my stomach churn, and I bit my tongue to keep the bile down. 

“Are you sure, dear?” She asked. “It’s not safe for an omega to be out alone.”

I looked up at her, giving a small smile. “I’m sure, Ellie,” I said. “It’s not safe to house one, either.”

She didn’t say anything after that. She simply followed me down the stairs, hesitating in the doorway of the kitchen and the foyer.

“At least let me package some food for the road,” she said. Her weary eyes looked at me sadly, lips pursed into a frown.

“That would be nice.”

Present day

The ride to this “bunker” was long and boring. I sat in the passenger seat, Sam opting to drive another car. I could feel the tension rolling off of Dean, his anger towards the pills obvious, but I didn’t give a damn. He may be my alpha, and he may have laid his claim on me, but I was still my own person. He should have known I wasn’t going to roll over and be the picture perfect omega. The submissive, soft-spoken mate that would carry pups and take care of her alpha. I bit my lip to stifle my scoff of annoyance. My whole life, I knew I would be expected to be a certain way because of my biology, but that just wasn’t who I was.

“Just because you’re my alpha, doesn’t mean I’m going to do what you say,” I said, eyes trained outside. “I’m not going to be your bitch.

I saw him flinch out the corner of my eye.

“Is that what you think I expect of you?” He asked. I shrugged. “You’re mistaken, omega.”

“Aren’t you mad about the pills?” I asked.

“No. I don’t control you. I’d prefer you to not take them, but if that’s what you choose… then so be it.” He let out a long breath.

“So, you’re not angry?” I clarified.

He smirked. “No, Y/N. I’m not angry. I was just taken a bit off guard.” 

“I’m not going to take the pills, Dean,” I said. I looked over at him. “I brought them just in case. But you were right… I do have you now.”

When Dean finally pulled into a long driveway, I perked up a bit, looking out the window in curiosity. Rolling fields melted into a tree covered path, leading down into what seemed to be the opening of a garage. Slowly Dean drove into it, and my curiosity grew even further. Old cars lined the walls, tools hanging near a large door.

He threw the car into park, getting out of the car quickly. Opening my door, he held out a hand. I raised a brow at it, but took it, allowing him to help me out. He shut it softly behind me, making his way to the trunk as I glanced around the room.

“This way, Y/N,” he said, his husky voice echoing in the large room. I looked over my shoulder, his leaf green eyes trained on me, the look soft but hesitant. I held his hand, lacing my fingers with his as I stood next to him. I felt him stiffen for a moment, before relaxing, a kind smile being shot my way before he led me into the bunker.

It was much larger than I had anticipated.

Polished tiled walls, shiny stone flooring, and things like I’ve never seen. A table with a map for its top, a variety of old fashioned communication devices along the wall; a library with rich, wood tables up the few steps beyond the war room, full of books, papers and weapons. Separate hallways and corridors branched out, and I didn’t doubt that there were secret passageways somewhere.

Dean led me through the library and into a long hallway. It was chilly in the bunker, and I found myself thanking Dean for letting me steal his flannel earlier.

He stopped at a room, glancing down at me for a moment before pushing open the door, stepping inside.

“This is my room,” he said as I looked around me. “It’s yours now, too I suppose.”

I met his eyes. “You want to share a room with me?” I asked, suddenly feeling quite small. I hadn’t been the easiest person to deal with lately, and even if my heat was beginning to subside, I knew I was going to drive him crazy. I’d never shared a home with another person that wasn’t a family member, let alone a room. Dean may be my alpha, my true mate, but he’s still a practical stranger.

“Of course I do,” he said earnestly, brows furrowing. “Why wouldn’t I? You’re my omega.” He raised his hand, cupping my cheek softly.

“Well I… I know I’m not exactly the nicest person on the planet, nor the easiest person to deal with,” I said, letting out a shaky breath.

Dean looked at me for a moment, eyes staring into mine as he nodded his head, smirking. “You amaze me, omega,” he said. His hand tightened a bit as he bent his knees slightly, looking into my eyes seriously. “You’re not like other omegas I’ve met. You’re not afraid.” He tilted his head a bit. “Most omegas I’ve met are timid and quiet and shy. Not that I’ve met many omegas.”

“Are you upset about that?” I whispered.

“Definitely not,” he said. “You’ve got fire in you, Y/N. You aren’t afraid to fight back. You can protect yourself, and you can speak for yourself, quite strongly, may I add.” He smiled as I did, my cheeks flushing. “I wouldn’t change you for the world. And I’m glad you’re my true mate.”

“Really?”

He smirked. “Oh, yes.” He leaned down, breathing in my scent. “I will worship you-” his hand trailed down from my cheek to my neck, down my arm, making me shiver- “and I will protect you. I will love you, and I will take care of you.” He leaned in closer, lips ghosting over my skin. “And I will never stop being amazed by you.” He swallowed thickly, and I closed my eyes. He pressed a tender kiss to his claim mark, arm snaking around my waist to hold me firmly to his chest. 

“What if you change your mind?” I breathed. “What… what if you realize you don’t like me?” His hand ran up under my shirt, fingertips trailing up my spine.

“That, my sweet ‘mega, could never happen,” he said as he picked me up, falling swiftly to the bed with me in his arms.


	5. Chapter 5

Present Day

It’s been a year since I met Dean Winchester.

Dean and his brother Sam had sat me down a few days after I moved into the bunker, explaining their life and their job. I was skeptical at first. Who wouldn’t be? But I could feel the earnesty and something I could only describe as guilt rolling off my alpha. His green eyes had been weary and staring at mine the entire time, gauging my reaction, waiting for the snap. But I didn’t. I remained calm through the whole time, asking questions, trying to make sense of something that couldn’t possibly be true. I felt that Dean was telling the truth, but it was still hard to believe.

The next few days after that was spent with Dean and I holed up in our bedroom. He told me his life story, starting from the fire and the demon who killed his mom, to hours before he met me. It was a hard pill to swallow, hearing about all the pain he had gone through his whole life. I could tell certain topics were sensitive, and I about collapsed when he told me about his experience in hell. He spilled everything to me, every secret; every thought. He didn’t hold back, and I could tell some things were hard for him to tell me, including the topic of his ex, Lisa. He explained how he had to wipe her memory, and the subject of her and Ben were still touch and go even now, but he said it was easier after meeting me.

I listened for two and a half days, laying on my side or sat facing each other, or tucked into his side. His words spilled from him, everything bottled up for years. He had said he always kept everything inside, but for some reason with me, he couldn’t stop. He couldn’t hold anything back.

He finished, and turned the topic towards me. I was hesitant at first. Sharing my past and my life to others was something I’d never done. But this was Dean, my true mate.

He was furious when I told him about Alaric and what he had done and how he treated me and my mother. I told him about the short time in my life where I was loved and treated by a woman whom I thought of as my own mother. I told him how I was mercilessly bullied in high school because I was the orphan girl living with the weird woman on the outside of town. And I told him how I’ve never had anything close to a boyfriend because of my trust issues and fears. He wasn’t too happy that I didn’t tell him it was my first time our first night together, but he understood why I didn’t tell him, and was glad he was my first.

He asked about Alex. I was hesitant at first, not knowing if I should bring up the two years of sexual harassment from the asshole alpha. But I did, and Dean said he wished he clocked the guy in the bar when he saw him that first night.

Dean expressed his hesitation to claim me that first night, the ten year age difference putting him off a bit. He sure as hell didn’t look thirty-three, but I did tell him I had always had a thing for older guys, resulting in his body pressed against mine and his lips attacking mine in less than two seconds. 

Months had passed since that night. In that time, Dean and I had become inseparable. We took the relationship a little slower after the first week or so, wanting to get a feel for it before really jumping into it. But after the second month or so, I realized I was falling for him, harder than I thought I would.

I had learned to shoot a gun, and he sparred with me a few times to build my self defense. He still wouldn’t let me hunt, something that both annoyed me and gave me relief. I did, however, travel with Dean and Sam when they hunted. Dean says he doesn’t want me alone in the bunker for a while, but I had a feeling it was more than that.

Now, after a year of knowing Sam and Dean, we have all settled into an easy routine. Dean and my relationship had quickly blossomed, but the words that sealed it had never been spoken to me. I knew I was in love with him, and I have told him a handful of times, not really one for the touchy feely moments. I knew he wasn’t either, but it did hurt my feelings when he wouldn’t say the words back.

I didn’t doubt he loved me. At least, not all the time. It wasn’t necessarily easy not hearing the words, but I could feel it. Mated pairs could feel the emotions each other had, and I could feel his love for me. I didn’t need words to reassure me.

“Your anniversary is coming up,” Sam said, sitting down across from me. “You guys plan anything yet?”

“No,” I said, putting another spoonful of cereal into my mouth. “I didn’t realize you knew it was our anniversary.”

He gave me a bitch face. “My brother mated someone. I never thought that would happen. Of course I remember the day it happened.”

“I don’t even know he does,” I said, scrunching up my face. “He hasn’t really said anything.”

“Maybe he’s just coming up with a surprise,” Sam said, shrugging. “Doesn’t want you finding out.”

I sighed. “Yeah, maybe.”

I got up from the table, dumping my bowl in the sink and turning to lean against the counter. “Sam?”

“Hm?”

“Do you think… has Dean been acting weird lately?” I asked. The younger Winchester brother looked at me, screwing his mouth in thought. “He’s been… distant.”

“I think he’s just stressed about the whole Abaddon and Mark of Cain situation,” he said. He gave me a reassuring smile. “I bet everything’s fine.”

“Yeah… okay,” I murmured, shoving my hands into my pockets and walking out into the hallway.

It was a genuine question. For the past month or so, Dean hadn’t talked to me very much. He’d turn away from me in his sleep rather than pull me into his chest. He seemed to spend more time at bars than at the bunker. I rarely saw him anymore, and the distance and neglect was beginning to take a toll on my body. Omegas who experienced neglect from their alpha or were unwanted by their alpha didn’t fare too well. Their bodies would soon become weaker, and they would become sick. It was one of the reasons I was so hesitant to ever be claimed. Alphas were dangerous to omegas, in more ways than one.

Pushing open the door to Dean and my room, I frowned when I didn’t find him in there. I hadn’t woken up to find him in bed, and I couldn’t find him in the bunker. My heat was due soon, but our anniversary of being mated was coming up, and I wondered if he even remembered.

Huffing, I grabbed my jacket, throwing it over my shoulder and stalking back out into the hallway. I wasn’t sure where Dean was, but I needed a stiff drink.

Giving Sam a quick heads up about my leave and grabbing a pair of car keys for one of the many cars in the Men of Letters’ garage, I headed out, driving out into the cold.

Six years ago

It had been two years since I was disowned by my family.

Those two years were spent forging documents to allow me to go to school, jumping city to city, school to school, all the while trying to block my biology away from the prying eye. The scent blockers and suppressants Eleanor had given me before I left the first time had gone way too fast, but I found a trustworthy omega supplier who gave me the sympathy discount.

Within those two years, I hadn’t spoken to nor seen Eleanor, and I wanted to keep it that that way for awhile. I didn’t want my presence to cause her trouble, not when my father had eyes everywhere in my hometown.

But when the dreaded call came about Eleanor and her recent hospital visit, I swallowed back the dread and trudged my way from Nebraska to Virginia.

Walking up that dirt driveway brought back the emotions I had buried years ago. Ones that I had to forget in order to survive. My love for the grandmother figure in my life, and the disgust and hatred for Alaric. The fear I had felt so long ago had diminished over the years on the road. I wasn’t the same girl Eleanor remembered, but she was the same.

A nurse opened the door, a skeptical look shot my way before she let me into the house. Her black hair was tied up neatly into a bun, her scrubs clean and ironed. She looked down at me from her bony nose, which twitched as I walked past her.

“Ellie?” I said. The gray head of hair over the couch, shook for a moment, a hand reaching out.

“Y/N?” She asked. “‘S that you?”

I walked over to her side, kneeling down on the carpet and taking her hand. I smiled at her, realizing how much I had missed her.

“Yeah, El,” I said quietly. “It’s me.”

She eyed me carefully. “You look so different,” she said. Her hand raised to run slowly over my tangled hair, thumb brushing over my dry cheek. “What happened?”

“Nah, don’t worry about me, El,” I said, smiling. “Look at you. What the hell happened?”

“Fell down the stairs,” she said, giving me an annoyed look. “Nearly broke a damn hip. But I’m alright. Refused to stay at the hospital. So they sent this twat to look over me.” She rolled her eyes. “Not the kindest lady, I’ll tell ya.”

“You don’t say,” I said, sparing a glance to the raven haired woman. “Will you be okay? They wouldn’t tell me anything over the phone.”

“They say I’ll be fine,” she said. “They just never know, an old lady like me.”

“That’s good,” I said, letting out a breath of relief. “I needed to make sure. Even though the threat of… Alaric is still out there.”

“No, not anymore.”

I raised a brow.

“He and Eliza moved a few months ago,” she said. My mouth dropped in shock. He was gone?

“I’ll be heading out now, Mrs. Whitby,” the nurse said. “Should only be a day or two now left of supervision.”

“Ah, whatever,” Eleanor muttered. The nurse showed herself out, and I laughed.

“Little harsh of you,” I said.

“Nah. Woman’s hard as steel. She don’t mind none. Besides, she done earned it.” She began to sit up.

“So,” she said, smiling. “Tell me all about what you’ve been doing.”

Present day

The bar, as expected, was quite crowded.

As soon as I walked inside, eyes were turning towards me, the faint sound of people sniffing the air making me uncomfortable. When I told Dean I wouldn’t take the pills anymore, I meant it. Although my scent had changed since being claimed, the distinct smell of an omega put many alphas on edge, and just made betas wrinkle their nose. People didn’t normally try anything. They wouldn’t dare, not when they’re claimed. But there will still be those couple, who think that even when an omega is claimed, they still are susceptible to taking a knot whenever and by whoever.

Those alphas usually end up with a broken nose if I have any say in it.

Sitting at the bar, I shifted, the cool metal of the gun Dean had given me a while ago giving me a sense of comfort. Ordering a beer and a couple shots, I pressed my fingers against my temples, sighing deeply. It seemed my head hurt all the time now. It came in waves, sometimes worse than others. It was strange, and downright painful, but alcohol usually helped soothe it. That, and having my damn alpha with me.

At this point, I was just pissed at Dean. He rarely was home, and rarely talked to me. Sam chalked it up to him being “stressed” about Abaddon and the Mark Of Cain, which I understood, but that didn’t justify him neglecting his omega, a young one at that.

The stool beside me shifted, and an alpha sat beside me. His body was turned towards me, and when I lifted my head to look at him, he was smirking darkly at me.

“Can I help you?” I asked, nodding a thanks to the bartender when he set down my drinks.

“Actually-” he reached over and took the other shot, downing it despite my protests- “you can.”

“And what exactly would that be?” I asked, flagging down the bartender again.

His hand moved to my thigh, fingers tightening painfully. I hissed in pain, letting a low snarl rip from my chest.

“My rut is starting and I haven’t had an omega in a very, very long time.” He licked his lips as his eyes raked over my body. “So you are going to get up and come with me and be the good bitch you were bred to be.”

I narrowed my eyes. “You are going to remove your hand from me before I shoot it off.”

The alpha laughed. I grit my teeth, seething. “Wow. Bold of you to threaten an alpha.”

“Bold of you to try and take a claimed omega,” I said.

“You’ve got an attitude that I don’t like,” he said. “That’ll change this weekend.”

“No, I don’t think so.” My hand snapped to his wrist, nails digging into his flesh. He grunted, and I felt my nails grow longer, something that had never happened before. I pushed back the surprise and growled. “But you will take your hand off me.” I shoved his arm away from me, retracting my nails but keeping my blazing eyes on his.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” He growled. “How fucking dare you.”

“Hey, Mr, I think she said to leave her alone,” the bartender said, giving the guy a dark look.

“This is my omega. She’s being incredibly disobedient. Don’t stand in my way.” His hand wrapped around my arm, pulling me off my seat.

“I’m not your fucking omega!” I said, trying to pry his hand off me. “Get the fuck off me!”

“Hey! You heard her!” The bartender said, making his way around the bar to stand behind me. “Let her go.”

“No! She’s an omega!” The alpha said. The scent of his rut made my nose scrunch up in disgust. I felt my mark throbbing, and I wished this asshole would take the damn hint. My other hand went behind me to wrap around the butt of my gun. “Its her purpose to serve alphas.”

“You ignorant prick!” I spit. His palm collided with my cheek, my head whipping to the side.

“That’s it!” The bartender said, gripping my shoulder and pulling me behind him and out of the hold of the other alpha. A beta woman took my arm and sat me down on one of the stools as the two alphas pummeled each other.

“Are you alright?” The woman asked, worried eyes on my face. I nodded.

“Yeah, just… shocked, I guess.”

A loud crack was heard, and my head snapped to the sound. The bartender’s face had collided with the bar, the alpha’s rut infused eyes trained on me intently. He stalked over to me and the beta backed up. I stumbled off the chair, pushing him back as he grabbed me, forcefully dragging me out of the bar.

Dean!

“Let go of me!” I demanded, my eyes searching and pleading with the other bar patrons to help me. But what happened with the bartender was fresh in their minds, and they didn’t dare.

Finally getting an arm free, I reached behind me and gripped the gun just as we got outside. Pressing the muzzle into his temple, I clicked the safety off.

“Let. Me. Go.” He swallowed thickly, and his grip loosened. I ripped my arm from his hold, and took a few steps back. I didn’t get far, however, because he lunged through the air, crashing into me and tackling me to the ground. I groaned as my head smacked against the pavement, his rough hands seizing my wrists and gripping them tight enough to leave dark bruises. He took the gun from my hands and shoved it into the back of his jeans, grabbing the collar of my shirt and hoisting me up, resuming his previous task of dragging me to his car.

Where the fuck was Dean? I knew he could feel my distress and fear, feel my anxiety. It wouldn’t take long to track my phone and find out where I was. It was five damn miles from the bunker.

Fear ripped through my stomach as the alpha slammed me up against his car.

“Let me go or I swear to god-”

“You’ll what?” He laughed. “You’ll kill me? Doubt that. Not gonna lie, you are one crazy omega bitch, nuthin’ like I’ve seen. But you’re hot, and you’re an omega that can take a knot. So shut the fuck up.”

Dean!

Trying desperately to remember the self defense training Dean put me through in the bunker, I reared my head back, bashing it into his nose before hoisting my knee up and crashing it into his groin. He yelped and I went boneless, slipping through his fingers and to the ground. Scrambling to my feet, I sprinted across the parking lot to my car, reaching into my coat pocket and fumbling with the keys.

I unlocked the car, opening the driver’s side door. The alpha was running now, nearing the car. I got in as quick as possible, locking the doors and not bothering with a seat belt as I peeled out of there.

I didn’t look back, missing both the frustrated scream from the alpha, and the man on the other side of the lot in his car, watching closely as I drove away.

***

I limped out of the garage, my head splitting, wrists aching, and face throbbing. I was still shaking, both with fear and anger. The Impala was in the garage when I got back, which meant he didn’t even try to get to me.

I made sure to slam the garage door shut, stalking through the hallway into the library. The brothers’ voices were distinct and I was seething. I touched the back of my head gingerly, fingers damp and sticky with red when I pulled them away. I no doubt had a concussion, and Dean soon would have one too.

“Man, I know you’re stressed, but your neglect and not being here is taking a toll on Y/N,” I heard Sam say as I walked into the library. Dean sat across from him at the table, his palm against his forehead, a bottle of whisky beside him.

“Yeah, no shit.”

Their heads snapped to my direction, both of them rising from their seats when they saw me. Both of their faces were matching expressions of shock, eyes wide.

“Y/N, holy shit. What happened?” Sam asked.

“Some asshole fucking attacked me,” I said, peeling my jacket off, neither brother missing the wince that flashed across my face. “Tried to take me back to his place to get him through his rut.”

“Jesus,” the younger Winchester breathed, Dean still silent. My eyes flickered to him.

I tried to walk past them but Dean reached out, grabbing me. I yelped, his hand curling around a tender bruise that was already forming on my arm. He ignored it, crushing me to his chest, chin resting on my head.

“I’m gonna kill him,” he growled lowly. I shuddered, feeling the anger roll off him.

“Where were you?” I asked desperately, the trauma of the events finally catching up to me. Tears welled over my eyes and stained his shirt. “I know you could feel it. I was calling for you, Dean!”

“I’m so sorry, ‘mega. I’m so, so sorry.” He buried his face into my hair, hands running over me, pulling me impossibly tighter.

“How could you not feel it? I was- I was so scared Dean. He almost won. He still has my fucking gun. God, how could you not hear me?” I asked.

“I… I felt something but… I didn’t know…” He stuttered, making me pull back.

“So you did feel it?” I whispered. “You fucking felt it, but you didn’t do anything?! What if he was able to get me into his car? What if I was at his place right now, being fucking raped by another alpha because I wasn’t strong enough and you didn’t do anything?!” My voice raised and I pushed him back harshly. He stumbled, nearly falling. He looked at me wide eyed, Sam’s going impossibly bigger as my eyes flashed gold for a good few seconds. “You’re my goddamn alpha, Dean! I was in trouble! You felt it, you should have come for me!” Tears were streaming down my cheeks now, more of rage than fear. I felt that rubberband that held me back all those years strain, the ferocity inside me growing. I took deep breaths, desperately trying to reel it back in.

“I know, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know what was happening. I just… With this mark on my arm, I… I’ve been feeling like that anyway. I just thought it was more intense now and I… baby, I’m sorry. Please, let me patch you up. Let me do something, please,” he said, voice cracking. I could feel his earnesty, and I closed my eyes. I took a few steps forward, about to envelope myself in his arms but three loud knocks sounded on the door. Our heads snapped to the sound, which wasn’t a great idea for me. A wave of dizziness washed over me, but I made my way towards the door anyway.

“Wait, Y/N, don’t open the door,” Sam said. I gave him a look over my shoulder, grabbing a gun from the table in the war room and walking up the steps.

“Omega! Don’t!” Dean followed me.

“Dean, stop with that shit, okay? Especially right now,” I said. “I hope it’s that damn alpha. I’ll fucking kill him.”

Unlatching the door, Dean made his way to stand behind me, hand on my waist as I opened the door a bit. My eyes locked with the man outside, and I could feel the blood drain from my face. I gasped a bit, taking a step back into Dean’s chest as my eyes grew wide.

“Dad?”


	6. Chapter 6

“Dad?” Dean asked, looking down at me. His chest was pressed against my back, and I took some comfort in that. But as my father’s eyes stared into mine, I felt my limbs go numb. My head fogged up, and I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. A flurry of emotions ran through my mind, overwhelming me. The shit seemed to continue piling up today. I never could seem to run away from my troubles for too long. But with the jumble of emotions in my mind, I still managed to keep a blank face- besides my wide eyes.

“Y/N,” Alaric breathed. His lips twitched, eyes going behind me to look into the bunker. His brows furrowed slightly, and then he trained his gaze onto Dean and the protective stance he had taken over me. And then his eyes flickered down to my neck and the scar that inhabited it. I saw him swallow, and then he met my heated glare again. “You’re so… different.”

“That’s what happens as you get older.”

He nodded, his eyes not wavering. “I suppose.” He swallowed again, sniffing. “Can we talk?”

“No.”

He raised his brows, lip twitching. “Why not? I’m your father.”

“No you’re not.” I shook my head. “You made that clear a long time ago.”

“Please,” he said. “We should talk.”

“Why? Why do you care after all these years?” I said. “Why the hell are you here?”

“Can’t a father come talk to his daughter?” Alaric sighed.

“Thought we both made it clear a long time ago that I’m not your fucking daughter,” I said.

He narrowed his eyes at me. “You are a peculiar omega.”

“Oh, fuck off.”

He clicked his tongue, looking up over my shoulder at Dean. “Shouldn’t you put her in her place? Omegas shouldn’t speak like that.”

Dean scoffed. “She can say whatever she damn well pleases.”

I smirked. “Yes, I can. So, please. Fuck. Off.”

“Y/N, we need to talk,” Alaric said, voice almost pleading now.

“I have nothing to say to you,” I said. He huffed, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t be so insolent, Y/N,” he said exasperatedly. “We need to talk.”

“We don’t need to do anything,” I hissed, taking a few steps back. Dean went back with me, a hand resting gently on my hip. “Now, if you would so kindly get the fuck off our property, I’d greatly appreciate it.” I gave him a sarcastic, tight lipped smile before shutting the door roughly. I swallowed, my eyes lingering on the door for a moment before I turned away, going back down the stairs. I raked a hand through my hair, wondering how the hell he found me. The bunker was unknown to everyone who lived in the area, so how Alaric found me, I wasn’t sure.

“Are you okay?” Dean asked, hand lightly resting on my shoulder. I shrugged him off, spinning around.

“Don’t act like everything’s okay,” I said. “I’m still angry at you.”

Dean frowned, falling silent. Instead, it was Sam who spoke up.

“That was your father?” He asked. “As in, the one who disowned you because you’re an omega?”

“That’s the only father I have, Samuel.”

“How the hell did he find you?” He questioned, ignoring my sarcastic tone.

I shrugged. “I don’t know. I don’t care. I just want him gone.”

“Maybe… maybe you should hear him out,” Dean said slowly. My head snapped towards him, a bewildered look on my face.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I said. “He doesn’t just get to show up here after telling his only child that they are no longer his kid. He doesn’t get to demand I talk to him. Not after what he put me through. If he thinks he can just come in here and act like he didn’t do anything, like he didn’t throw his omega daughter out on the street for any alpha to pick up, he’s got another thing coming.” And with that, I spun on my heel, stalking out of the library and towards Dean’s and my room.

My heat was coming, and soon. I could feel it starting, and I knew I would need Dean. I spent years riding them through on my own, but that was when I was doped up on suppressants. Even claimed, heats were still worse than when I was on them.

I wanted to leave, if only for a few days. I wanted to get the hell away from Dean and Alaric. But I knew my heat would come up within that time frame, and I’d just need to suffer for a little while longer.

Why Dean hadn’t come to my aid, I didn’t know. I knew his reasoning was bullshit, I was fucking scared. I knew he could feel the shift. I handled myself fine, but what if I hadn’t? Alphas were biologically stronger than omegas, and I easily could’ve been overpowered. With the way he had been so distant lately, it made me feel as though I did something wrong. Like I must have said or acted a certain way for him to distance himself from me. After thinking for a while, I understood. Everything became clearer.

I was the problem. But it wasn’t one certain thing… it was just me.

I wasn’t the wanted omega. I had alpha traits inside an omega’s body. Alex had been right. “Borderline feral.”

I slumped on the bed, eyes staring blankly at the wall. I now realized why I had always been so lonely. Why friends never stayed and no one ever romantically took an interest. I repelled people. My personality was intolerable. I was intolerable.

I laid back on the bed as tears silently fell down my cheeks. I couldn’t help the way I was. God knows I’ve tried. I’ve tried to be nicer. Tried to sit idly by as alphas spit lewd comments to omegas on the streets, or hands wandered while I waitressed. I tried to keep my temper at bay. If left alone, I was quiet. I was shy. Hell, I was even meek at times. But, truth was… I just wasn’t born to be an omega.

It was rare. But it happened. Omegas could have the potential to go full feral. All omegas did. Some were just more susceptible to the wild side than others. The numbers were incredibly low, only a handful of recorded cases in history. Omegas typically didn’t go full feral, and ones that did were quickly detained. The ones who were close to it normally needed alphas to keep them at bay. And in order for them to go full feral, something would have to happen to make them snap, and for them to change.

I always ignored the facts. I always tried to reason with myself. Maybe I was just different. Maybe I just had a temper. But the alpha-like temper, the gold-turning eyes, the claws, the attitude. I could no longer ignore the facts.

If I didn’t want to go full feral, I’d have to be incredibly careful. Luckily, I had an alpha. My true alpha. That probably made it better.

But it didn’t matter. No matter how hard I tried in the past, I couldn’t stop being myself. I had fire, and I could never douse it out. It just so happened Dean didn’t like that fire. He once did, most people admire it at first. But eventually, they begin to fade. It gets tiring. Watching people go was the norm for me. But watching Dean fade, watching Dean go, was absolutely killing me.

Not having the usual love from a mate takes a toll on the body, and I’d already felt the changes. The aches in the joints, the nausea, the headaches. What’s worse than feeling the neglect, was missing someone who slept beside you each night.

All I gave him was love. I tried to be the perfect omega. I learned to cook, or, at least tried. I was quieter. After being claimed, my temper had already soothed. I was nicer than I used to be. I thought I was likeable. I thought I was loveable for the first time in my life. That someone could overlook my flaws, and still allow themselves to love me. But I was sarcastic. I cursed. I did have a temper. I’m anxious and bite my lips too much, to the point that they’re always broken and torn. I don’t sleep through the night and I kick as I dream. But it’s not just my flaws. It’s the way I am. I knew he was disappointed to find out I was his mate. Who wouldn’t be? Who the fuck would want me?

The door creaked open, but I hadn’t heard it. I was too wrapped up in my own mind, my own self doubt and hate to hear it. To hear the sigh in the doorway from the person I loved most in the world; the person who I knew stopped loving me.

The bed dipped beside me, and a pair of arms scooped me up, pulling me to their chest. They laid back down, spooning me from behind, their face burrowing into my hair.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. I sniffed, ignoring him. He had said that already, and I didn’t want to hear it anymore. Why he was putting effort into the relationship now… boggled my mind. But I didn’t ask. The comfort of my alpha already began to calm me, and I relished in that as long as I could.

“Are you… are you tired of me?” I murmured.

“What are you talking about?” He asked. I turned in his hold, and his thumb came up to wipe away the tears on my cheek. “Of course not.”

“I’m easy to hate,” I said quietly. “I wouldn’t blame you. I know I’m not easy to be around. I have a terrible personality. I have too many flaws. No matter how hard I try, I can’t be likeable. I hate myself.”

The last words were said so lowly, I didn’t think he heard it. But he did.

“Don’t say that,” he said harshly. “I love you.”

I noticed he didn’t deny my claims. He blatantly disregarded them. I sunk further into his arms, wanting nothing more than to completely disappear.

“Not anymore,” I whispered. It was almost inaudible, and I know he didn’t hear me. He simply laid there, chin on top of my head again.

It wasn’t long before I drifted to sleep.

***

It was late when I woke up. Dean had long gone, the bed cool beside me. I sighed, realizing it was foolish of me to hope he was still there when I woke, knowing he almost never was.

Rolling out of bed, I seeked Sam out to ask where Dean was. He wasn’t sure, but he said Dean hadn’t left long ago. I sighed again, screwing my lips up as I made my way back to our room.

I heard a phone ringing inside as I grew closer. I pushed open the door, looking around for the ringing phone, assuming it was mine.

However, when I picked up my phone, it was just a black screen, and the ringing continued. Bending down, I spotted Dean’s phone on the other side of the bed.

I walked around, picking up his phone and seeing a name I didn’t recognize.

Diana.

Furrowing my brow, I hit answer, holding the phone up to my ear. I waited a few seconds, and a sigh came from the other end.

“Dean?” A shrill voice said from the other end. “Dean? You there? I’ve been waiting here forever. I’ve got your favorite on… absolutely nothing.”

I clenched my jaw, bones vibrating under my skin. I felt my eyes turn, the mark on my neck on fire as fury surged through my veins, the feeling of neglect and betrayal settling deep within my soul.

“Who the hell is this?” I hissed. I could hear her breath hitch, and I could hear the audible gulp.

“Is this… is this not Dean?” She asked, voice shaking.

“This is his omega. Now, again, who the fuck is this?”

She swallowed again. “Diana.”

“Diana,” the name slipped past my lips, over my tongue and into the air with a vicious hiss. The bastard.

“How long have you been shacking up with my mate… Diana?”

“Three… three months.”

I pulled the phone away from my ear, not looking at it as I hung up, eyes a brilliant gold.

I could feel it. The shift. I could feel something click in my brain as my blood began to boil under my skin. Between my dad showing up, the neglect from Dean lately, and the knowledge that he had been cheating for three months did it. It finally did it.

I finally snapped.

I growled as I chucked the phone against the wall, watching as the screen cracked and the back popped off. It clattered to the ground, and I rolled my shoulders, twisting my head side to side. Fangs had protruded from my canines, and I looked into the mirror, startling gold eyes staring back. Snarling at myself, I turned away, stalking into the hallway. I needed to find Dean.

“Hey, Y/N,” Sam started, walking up behind me. I stiffened, and I could hear when he stopped, when his breath caught in his throat. “Y/N?”

I turned my head to the side, eyes meeting his for a second. I watched as his hazel ones widened, realizing what had happened, and his mouth began to form the words “holy shit.”

I lunged, pushing him to the ground roughly, giving him a frightening growl. Surprise and confusion flashed across his face, and I sprinted away, running up the steps and unlocking the front door.

“I’m calling Dean!” Sam called. I looked over my shoulder, eyes narrowing at the younger Winchester. He was holding up his phone, and I smirked, fangs gleaming in the light of the bunker.

“You do that,” I rasped. Sam flinched at the tone of my voice, much deeper and huskier than normal. I knew damn well that it wouldn’t do anything, and as Sam pressed ‘call,’ I watched as his face fell as it went straight to voicemail.

Giving him one more teeth-baring smile, I crouched down, shoulders hunched like a wolf as I crept towards the rail.

“Tell Dean… I know,” I sneered. Sam swallowed thickly, and tilted his head. “Tell him… Diana is first. His fault.”

“What?… Who’s Diana?” He asked quietly. I smiled at him, lips curling back over my teeth brilliantly.

Winking, I turned quickly, opening the door and fleeing the bunker. I dashed up the few steps, allowing the cool air to brush over my heated skin. Still in a coiled stance, I tilted my head up, gold meeting dazzling silver, the moon shining radiantly down onto the Earth. I sniffed, closing my eyes briefly, scenting the air around me.

My eyes flashed open, head lowering as a smirk melted its way onto my face. I stood up straight, giving one last glance at the bunker before taking off into another sprint.


	7. Chapter 7

The world was different.

My body had changed drastically. Primal instinct took over, and I had turned wild. Deep down, I knew I had gone feral. But as it sunk in, I could no longer think straight. Basic survival instinct had overwritten my normal thoughts, my body buzzing with a rage that I had never felt before.

And for the first time in my life, I was scared of myself.

The moon’s light reflected off the small pool, casting a shimmery glow on the surface. I was crouched beside it, the air cool and soft as it whisped past me.

After leaving the bunker, I had ran deep into the woods, allowing the baring trees to shelter me. My veins burned beneath my skin, a sheer sweat breaking out over my forehead despite the low temperature.

I reached my hand out, slowly, letting my fingertips trail over the surface of the water. It was icy, but felt amazing against my heated skin. I moved closer to the edge, my whole hand submerged now, fingers wiggling, little splashes creating small waves that rippled along the top of the pond, making the lily pads and fallen leaves dance on the water’s plane.

I tilted my head as a twig snapped in the distance. I felt my ears perk up, and I instantly scented the air, not catching alpha, omega or beta- which led to the animal option. I furrowed my brows, gold eyes searching the dark brush, waiting for the creature to emerge.

A red fox slowly crept out from the dark, muzzle lowered to sniff the ground. Its fur shined in the moonlight, and I watched as its muscles moved under its sleek coat as it lowered its head to drink from the pond. I withdrew my hand, eyes still on the fox, and I moved along the water’s edge, head tilting more as I went.

Its eyes raised then, locking with mine before it lowered its stance and bounded away, crashing softly back into the trees.

I huffed, lowering back onto my haunches, mouth twisting up in a sour frown. It would’ve been nice to have some sort of hunt.

Sighing, I stood up, taking one last glance at the pond before running off into the trees again.

***

The bunker was silent.

Sam held his head in his hands, eyes closed as he thought.

He always admired Y/N’s hard head and take-no-bullshit attitude. He loved her sarcasm and wit, not to mention her fire. She quickly became the sister he never had, and now she was gone.

He knew about the rare cases of omegas like her. The ones that were more independent and didn’t quite fit the description of their presentation. Omegas were rare on their own, whether they were male or female omega. Some were more submissive than others, which just so happened to be the majority of omegas.

Sam read about feral omegas years ago, fascinated by them. Everyone had a chance to go feral, except betas. Feral alphas were dangerous, no questions asked. But feral omegas weren’t a force to be reckoned with.

They were lethal. They didn’t care much about life, surviving solely on basic instinct and the need to protect their pups. Sam knew the only way to bring a feral omega back to themselves, was if their alpha stepped in. Their mate.

The omega would need to nest with their mate in order to return from ferality. It would take about a week, but within that week, the omega would progressively return back to normal.

It didn’t matter how the omega was. Some are more susceptible to the primal side of themselves, and with others, it takes a bit more. But Sam figured that Y/N, like a handful of other omegas out there, were simply just some that were more in touch with that side.

Ferality doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with personality. An omega who is one-hundred percent submissive and meek can be more in touch with their feral side. The reason Y/N had been called feral and thought to be feral was because of her personality. Some omegas just aren’t built submissive and meek. Y/N could be shy, sure. But definitely not meek. She wasn’t your stereotypical omega, and even though most omegas were the quiet, meek, submissives that they were thought to be, not all of them were- and Y/N was the perfect example.

Sure, she had some alpha-like tendencies. But Dean had expressed to Sam that they were something he loved about her. Sam had listened to Dean rave about the many things of her personality that he loved, one of them being that she wasn’t a stranger to talking back to him when needed. That even when he tried to make her submit, it would take time, and usually some very hardcore persuasion. Dean didn’t always like using his biology against hers, but when he did, she certainly didn’t make it easy- something both brothers admired.

Y/N had been gone for hours by the time Dean got back.

Sam’s head snapped up at the sound of the door swinging open, the elder brother sauntering in, a smug smile on his face.

“Dude, where the hell have you been?” Sam asked harshly, standing up. “I’ve been calling you.”

“Yeah, I forgot my phone.” Dean shrugged and walked into the library. He furrowed his brows at Sam’s distressed expression. “What’s got your panties in a twist?”

“It’s Y/N.”

Dean stiffened, fists clenching. “What do you mean?”

“I don’t- I don’t know. Something happened and-and she snapped. She just snapped, man.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Dean asked.

“She took off like a bat outta hell. Was able to knock me down… Her eyes… they were gold and her scent changed. It was almost… it was bitter.” Sam ran a hand through his hair. “Dean… I think- I think she’s gone full feral.”

***

As I neared the house, I could smell him. Smell my mate. His scent was faint, like he’d been there before, enough times to leave his scent, but wasn’t there now.

The simple house stood on the edge of town, in a strip of houses scattered a few blocks from each other. I was crouched in the yard, eyes staring up at the white bricks and black shutters. My lip curled in disgust as I saw a shadow move across one of the windows. The curtain moved in one of the west windows, a head peeking out. A pair of eyes caught mine. The curtain fell closed again and I made my way towards the house, ducking around the side of it towards the patio door. My body buzzed with bloodlust, fangs sharp and gleaming in the moonlight as I raked my claws down the side of the door towards the knob.

Turning it, I smirked as it clicked open, and I pushed inside, sniffing the air for the scent of the omega.

A clatter sounded from upstairs, my head snapping towards it. My feet carried me through the dark house, body coiled in a predatory stance as I stalked up the stairs, trailing a single nail along the wall.

Following the scent, I found myself at the end of a hallway, in front of a closed and locked door. I took a few steps back, eyeing the wood carefully, before bringing my foot up, splinters flying towards me. I didn’t flinch at the ear splitting scream that tore through the air. Instead, I smiled wickedly at it.

I stood in the doorway, illuminated only by the light of the moon outside and the faint nightlight in the hallway. Diana was crouched against the wall, crying. Her one hand was clenched in her chocolate hair as the other held a butcher’s knife. Tears fell from her crystal eyes, and she shook her head slowly.

“Please don’t,” she whispered. “I don’t want to die.”

I lowered to my haunches, hands placed flat on the floor in front of me. I watched her carefully, head tilting in confusion. Her scent was sweet, but there was another scent that I had come familiar with. My eyes flickered to the bed, a flannel draped over the foot of it. I made my way closer to it, hand reaching up to run over the fabric. I locked my eyes on Diana again, lifting the flannel and smelling it.

Dean.

I hissed, clenching the fabric tightly in my hand. Diana flinched, trembling. I could tell she wasn’t a fighter. And by the way she curled up into herself, knife now facing the ground, I could tell she was the kind of omega that was all submissive. She was meek, and wasn’t too keen on the idea of hand to hand combat.

She was the opposite of me. She was the omega most alphas wanted. The kind that they’d have to protect. The kind that wouldn’t fight anything the alpha said.

I snarled, realizing that this must be the reason Dean wanted her. He must have wanted an omega that was softer, little less temperamental. Easier to be with.

“Feral omegas can be fixed,” Diana said, voice shaking. “You just need to find Dean. Yeah, Dean can help. Just.. just let me find my phone and I’ll- I’ll call him for you… Okay?”

I chuckled darkly. She cringed, eyes wavering to the floor.

“No,” I hissed, dropping the flannel.

“Please don’t kill me,” she whispered. “Dean wanted an omega.”

“Omega,” I grunted.

“Yeah… an omega.” She looked up at me hesitantly. “An omega who wasn’t such a fucking bitch. An omega whose past wasn’t so fucked up. An omega who doesn’t have a temper and can go through the week without having a damn panic attack,” she sneered. “An omega who could take a knot like a fucking pro.” She laughed, and my head dropped a bit. “He wanted someone a little more experienced in that field. And let me tell you, he got everything from me.”

I growled, lunging towards her. I grasped the knife, throwing it somewhere behind me before wrapping a hand around her neck, claws digging into her skin as my other hand twined itself into her hair, gripping it tightly. She gasped, eyes wide with fear.

“Dean…” I said, lip twitching. I tightened my grip in her hair, smirking darkly as she whimpered. Curling my lips back over my teeth, I let out a threatening hiss before muttering, “mine,” and moving my hand out of the way to sink my teeth into her throat.

***

“Fuck… Fuck!” Dean ran a hand through his hair, pacing. He pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes, ripping them away and kicking over a chair harshly.

“Dean, you gotta calm down,” Sam said. “Looks, she said that… that she knew. She said to tell you that she knew about Diana and that she’s first.”

Dean’s head snapped up towards his brother, green eyes wide with fear and desperation. “What?”

“I’ve never heard of a Diana and I was so damn confused but she seemed really pissed,” Sam said. “And whatever this Diana chick did, on top of her dad coming around, I think that’s what probably derailed her.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” Dean slammed his fists down on the table, making Sam jump.

“Jesus, Dean!” Sam exclaimed. “The hell, man?”

“Oh God, we gotta get to Diana,” Dean whispered to himself.

“Who the fuck is Diana?” Sam asked. Dean’s eyes rose slowly to his brother’s, before falling away in guilt. “… No. Dean, please tell me… please tell me you didn’t go and cheat on Y/N. Please tell me you didn’t cheat on your fucking true mate. Y/N, who already has self esteem issues and trust issues. Y/N who fucking loves you so much, she’d take eternity in hell for you. Please tell me you didn’t do that!”

Sam’s chest heaved, and his hazel eyes were trained on his older brother. Dean’s eyes were casted down, teeth biting down on his lip.

“God dammit, Dean!” Sam said, hands going up to fist in his hair. “What the fuck is wrong with you? How the hell could you do that? Do that to her, of all the people in the world? How could you hurt the one person who loves you more than anything? Huh?”

“I don’t know,” Dean said softly. He stood up straight, eyes watery. He looked up at Sam finally, utter defeat written across his face. “I don’t know.”

“That’s not good enough,” Sam said harshly. “That’s not a fucking answer. Well good going, Dean.” Sam scoffed, dropping his hands to his sides and shook his head. “You just ruined the one good thing in your life.”

“I know,” Dean whispered, nodding. He pressed his palm against the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes and breathing in deep. He never thought she’d find out. Never thought the thing he had with Diana would go on this long. He knew he screwed up. He had been trying to end it. But he never did. He loved Y/N, more than anything. She was the light in his world. He knew that what he was doing could- and would- break her heart if she ever found out. But he never thought it would go to this extent. He never thought that this added on top of everything else in her life would finally make her snap. He knew she was strong, and he also knew how fucked up her life had been. Yet he still made the mistake of falling into another omega’s bed. Over and over again.

“I know.”

***

My tongue flicked out to lap at my lips, running over them and then my teeth. I could still taste the metallic, coppery taste of her blood. My hands were covered in it, hair around my face stuck to my skin from it. My lips were stained dark red from it.

I hadn’t blinked an eye as I tore out her throat. I hadn’t thought twice as I ripped her heart from her chest. I had watched with a terrifying glint of elation in my eye as the life faded from hers. I had felt the rage inside me sate just a bit.

Ferality changes you. No matter who- or what- you are. Both alphas and omegas who go feral don’t go long before giving into the bloodlust. Whether it be directed at someone close to them, or someone who crossed them.

In this case, it was Diana. The bitch who had been rolling around in the sheets with my mate.

It was usually the alpha’s or omega’s mate who was killed. Not even the bond of a mate could hold back the craving to kill. To give into the hunter inside. But no matter how angry I was, deep down, I knew I’d never be able to hurt Dean. Not to the point of his death, anyway. The feral omega in me didn’t understand that yet. But deep down, the real me did.

I made my way back to the pond. The moon had began to set, the stars still glittery in the night sky, the moon’s light lower now. I bent down, submerging my hands into the cool water, washing off the blood before cupping some in my hand, taking a drink from the icy liquid. It quenched my thirst and helped rid my mouth of the metallic aftertaste, and I washed my face real quick before looking back up the the sky.

I wasn’t sure where I wanted to go. But I decided to let the wind carry me wherever it went. I didn’t care if Dean found me or not. I didn’t care that I left a bloody corpse a few miles behind me. I cared about pure survival, and sating the rage inside me that crept into my bones and settled deep within my soul.

So, I stood from the pond, allowing my bare feet to carry me through the woods, the wind blowing across my hot skin deliciously, and I slung the old flannel over my shoulder, allowing the scent of my mate to linger there beside me, even if it no longer brought me comfort.


	8. Chapter 8

I wasn’t sure how I ended up here; the middle of a dense forest in Washington state, but I didn’t really care. Not a single part of me cared about where I was, or what was to come. It was simply survival and the everlonging rage that tingles in the back of my mind 24/7.

It was daybreak, the sun rising over the tops of the Cascade Range of mountains, the rosy finger tips of the sunlight beginning to stretch across the horizon, casting a watery pink hue across the valley and river.

It had been nearly a week since I left Kansas, a week since I left Diana’s body mangled in her bedroom. The old me wouldn’t have been able to handle the guilt of killing another human being. But the feral me, the one who was based solely on instinct and animality, couldn’t care less.

The temperatures were cooler than in Kansas, but my body ran on higher temperatures now, and I often found myself in a cool sweat when running long. I had lived primarily on wild berries and pine tree bark, usually picking up picnic baskets or I’d sneak into the smaller towns and scrounge for something there. The less human interaction, the better.

My jeans had long ripped, my jacket long left behind in Kansas. My tank top’s strap was torn in half and holes were scattered over the fabric. The only thing I had kept in the best condition was Dean’s flannel.

I wore it usually, tying it around my waist or neck when I didn’t. It was comforting, even if this was his fault in the first place. But I suppose I couldn’t blame him. Not really. It was my fault for not being able to provide for my alpha. Not being able to please or be enough for him.

I was crouched on the edge of a small cliff. The animals began to wake, the nocturnal ones long gone to bed. I had done my best to avoid the wolves that prowl the woods at night. Not that I would have minded the company.

I climbed down from the rock, landing softly on my feet on the grass. They were cut up, callused and dirty, but like most things, I didn’t notice. I simply winced at the sharp sting when I landed on them, and continued my hunt for breakfast.

There was an abundance of pine trees, and I happily peeled off the bark and ate that along with a few minnows I found swimming in a small pool off the river. I sat by the water, my toes dipping into the frigid blue as I ate and watched the sun rise. The temperature began to rise only slightly, the sun doing wonders against my ice bitten skin. Even though I didn’t feel cold and my body adjusted to it better, my skin still prickled and my teeth would chatter at night.

I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand when I was finished, taking a quick drink from a spring, and jogging down the river’s bank. I wasn’t sure what exactly I was doing, but I could feel trouble coming.

“Hey! Hey, you!” A voice echoed off the mountains around us, and I stopped. I knew I must’ve looked like a wreck; hair matted, claws out, dirt and mud staining my skin. I turned my head slowly, gold eyes flickering widely as I glanced over my shoulder.

A man, around sixty, stood with a fishing pole and tackle box. His hat was crooked, much like his nose, and his gray eyes were soft and kind; worried.

“Are you alright?” He asked. I watched him carefully, taking a half step back as he set down his tackle box.

I didn’t say anything, eyes never wavering from him as he reached into his bag, pulling out a few granola bars and a bottle of gatorade. “You hungry? Thirsty?”

He held the items out for me. I looked at them, then at him, brows furrowed in confusion as I leaned forward, snatching them from his hands quickly.

“You’re the only feral omega I’ve come across,” he said smiling. I took another half step back. “I always wondered what they’d be like. I’ve seen a feral female alpha. Now, that’s a sight.” He chuckled, almost as if it were a joke. “But a feral omega? You’re my first! Is there somewhere you need to be? You got an alpha I can take you to?”

I growled, baring my teeth.

“I guess not,” he said, holding his hands up defensively. “Can I at least give you a ride somewhere? I know the law says not to approach ferals but… I never was one to follow rules.”

“No,” I grunted, holding the granola bars and gatorade closer to me.

“You sure? It’s not safe for an omega to be out here alone. Feral or not. Let me drive you somewhere,” he said, taking a few steps toward me.

“No,” I said again. He sighed, giving a soft smile. But he pushed at it, getting close enough that his hat casted a slight shadow over my face.

“Come on. Let me get you somewhere safer.” He raised his hand to lay it on my shoulder, but I snapped. A snarl ripped past my lips, eyes swirling furiously as I pushed his hand away, the food dropping from my arms as I got my hands around his neck. His hands wrapped around my wrists, eyes wide as he raked his nails across my skin in an attempt to break free. My claws dug into his flesh, and the muscles under my arms flexed as I jerked them, the audible snap of his bone filling the air. I felt the crunch under my palms, and his eyes were wide open in shock as he slumped to the gravel, fishing pole falling beside him. I bent down to retrieve the food, giving one last curl of the lip.

“No.”

***

I had looted the man’s pack, emptying what wasn’t needed or wanted, and filling it back up with the granola bars and water he had given me, and the few first aid supplies, comb and socks that were inside.

I was about a mile up the bank, feet crunching into the gravel and rocks as I walked. The sun was warmer today, and I found myself tying Dean’s flannel around my waist again. I pushed my hair back out of my face, eyes wandering up into the trees that covered the mountains all around me.

The water moved softly to my left, rippling over the rocks in the shallow waters of the shore, a little calmer towards the center of the river where it was deeper. It was beautiful, the land around me. And I finally felt as though I belonged. In the wild, more in touch with the animality that bubbles within all humans; beta, alpha or omega. Alphas typically are more common to go feral, male omegas next in line. Female omegas are next to extinct, but here I was- feral, too.

I knew the only way to reel it back in would be to return to Dean. But I couldn’t do that. Not yet. I couldn’t face him, knowing that he’d have found Diana by now, the omega he had found better than the one he had, the omega he had been knotting after knotting his mate.

I shivered in disgust, a frown taking place on my face. A pang of sadness washed over me for the first time since I went full feral. It finally sunk in; Dean hadn’t wanted me. He found an omega that he preferred, one that was gorgeous, soft, submissive and was able to provide things I obviously couldn’t, which was why he turned to her instead. There was no other logical reason. I just wasn’t enough.

The feral omega didn’t like being sad. Didn’t like feeling worthless. I growled, turning suddenly to stalk into the trees, fist rearing back to meet the rough bark of a nearby pine. Over and over, my fist pummeled the tree until the bark had been splintered and chipped off, my knuckles inflamed and busted. Blood trickled down my fingers, mixing with the fisherman’s, and I licked the wounds, turning to train my eyes on the twinkling water again as I cleaned the cuts and blood off my skin.

***

Dean’s hands clenched around the steering wheel, the scene from Diana’s house still fresh in his mind.

He could still see her, the gaping hole in her chest where her heart once was, the organ sitting hauntingly on the pillow he once rested his head on. Her eyes were wide and staring, shock and fear written across her delicate features.

Dean couldn’t believe Y/N had done something like this. It was so unlike her. She had a temper, sure, but not to this extent. She didn’t like to fight. She didn’t like violence. And she sure as hell never thought about murdering someone.

He didn’t want to believe it, that his omega had gone feral. But the evidence was there, and Sam had told him how different she was. 

“Hey, listen to this,” Sam said, starling Dean from his thoughts. “A Washington man was found dead, neck broken and things stolen on the banks of a river in the Cascade Mountains.”

“Okay… so?” Dean asked.

“So, the coroner report says that there was DNA found under the man’s fingernails,” Sam said, turning slightly in his seat to look at Dean. “DNA belonging to an omega. A feral one.”

Dean took his eyes off the road for a split second, locking on his brother, before he turned the wheel, Sam shouting in surprise as Dean turned around, speeding back west.

“Jesus, Dean!” Sam said, gasping.

“She’s heading to her old town, and I bet she doesn’t even know it,” Dean said, biting his lip. “Fuck!”

“The one we found her in?” Sam asked, furrowing his brow.

“Yeah, what other town would there be? It’s where she went to college, where she lived… where she knew a lot of people.”

Sam pressed his palm into his forehead. “Okay, okay. So, what, you think she’s going there out of… of of instinct? Remembrance?”

“Feral omegas will move place to place, typically places they once knew. My money is that she’s trekking up to Washington, the old town she used to live in. Uh, uh… Pullma.”

“That’s a day’s drive from here,” Sam said, opening a new tab and pulling up maps. He typed a few things, Dean glancing over at him.

“How the hell do you have internet on that thing anyway?” He asked. Sam chuckled.

“There’s a thing called a hotspot, Dean,” Sam muttered, eyes focused on the map.

Dean made a face. “A what now?”

Sam ignored him, looking up at the road. “Take the next exit.”

Dean sighed, heart clenching in his chest. He wasn’t sure what he’d find in Washington, whether it be a completely different woman from his omega, or if he’d find a sliver of the old her inside. He never thought of her this way; borderline feral. She just had a personality omegas didn’t typically have, both male and female. He knew she was sensitive to that phrase, “borderline” feral. She didn’t like her personality being judged in a way that made her feel wrong, like she didn’t fit the omega category, like she was freak. Dean admired her for it. Admired the badass attitude and take no shit way about her.

He let out a jagged breath at the thought of Diana. Why he decided to go home with her those three months ago, he wasn’t sure. It had been after a hunt, and he had one too many drinks, the brunette omega flirty, pretty and soft spoken, coaxing him into her bed after a few hours. He woke up the next morning with regret, but with her phone number as well.

From that day on, he’d sneak out of the bunker and meet up with her at least once a week. Each time, he told himself it would be the last. That he had a mate at home, his true mate no less, and that he couldn’t be doing this to her. He couldn’t be running off to warm another omega’s bed when his mate was at home, alone in his. But somehow, he’d always end up back at the little house in the woods, or simply having quickies in the car or back of bars.

Guilt ate away at him. He knew this would break her, knew her self esteem was low as is. He knew her life had been a rough one, he knew that she would be a little more wound up after her father showed up. And he had been so careless as to leave his phone there.

She had just broken his heart, the things she said in their room. He hated that she thought he didn’t care for her. He hated that she felt unloved. He hated that she felt as though he was getting tired of her. He knew he had been pulling away, running to Diana instead of comforting his omega. He took notice to how thin and sickly looking she became, realizing it was from the neglect of her alpha.

His nails dug into the steering wheel, grief consuming him. He loved her, more than he ever thought possible. Yet he decided to fuck around with another omega. He knew it was a mistake, one that he’d regret for the rest of his life. He wasn’t sure what the reason was that made him cheat on Y/N. He wasn’t sure there was one. All he knew was, that it was a mistake. One that he would be paying the price for, for the rest of his life just knowing how much it hurt his omega.


	9. Chapter 9

The station was bustling with activity.

Sam and Dean looked around, officers pushing past them as a few people from the Forensics unit talked with the chief.

It was mayhem. As soon as news broke out about a feral omega in the area, a murderous one at that, the department broke out in chaos, protocol forgotten and all hands on deck.

“Can I help you gentleman?” A voice asked. The brothers turned, an elvish man staring up at them. Sam cleared his throat, the two showing the badges from their coats. The man squinted, widening his eyes a bit. “We were wondering when you were going to show.”

He led them through the department, to an office at the back. Shutting the door softly, he gestured to the chairs in front of the desk. “Please, sit.”

The Winchesters complied, a questioning glance being thrown between the two.

“So, we heard the gist of what’s going on,” Sam said. “Mind filling us in on the behind the scenes information?”

The beta swallowed, the intense Alpha scent rolling off of Dean alarming. “Uhm, well… A hiker called it in. A man, William Berkeley, was found dead deep in the Cascades.” He opened a folder, a few pictures from the Forensics unit of evidence, and a report of the crime was handed to Sam. “His neck was broken, a few scratches on his skin. Looks as though his bag was taken, whatever the omega didn’t want was left scattered near the body.”

“You sure it was an omega?” Sam asked, looking at the few pictured of the man’s body and of the crime scene.

“Positive,” he said. Dean humphed. “The lab reports came back. Omegas and alphas have very different compositions from each other and from betas. But it changes even more when they go feral. DNA was found under the man’s finger nails. Because of the change in biological composition after they go feral, we can’t see if it matches anyone in our system. But we know for sure that it’s an omega, one who has turned feral recently. And their lethal.”

“Do you know if it’s male or female?” Sam asked, handing the photos back.

The beta shook his head. “Unfortunately not. Male and female omegas have too similar compositions. We’d need a blood and urine test to make sure.”

“So where exactly did you find Mr. Berkeley’s body?”

***

I couldn’t go back the way I came. I could smell the alphas and betas from where I was sitting, high up in the trees on a ridge overlooking the valley. They looked so small from up where I was, but I knew what they were doing.

The man had been charted away, photos taken, area scanned for evidence and sectioned off. Caution tape flapped in the breeze, and I got another whiff of the scents from below. The alpha scents made me shift uncomfortably, a low growl rumbling in my chest.

When the wind changed directions, a few people tensed up. I backed up into the trees, the shadows hugging me, keeping me unseen. I crouched down, golden eyes all that could be really seen. A few heads turned up in my direction, no doubt scenting omega. When a couple guns were drawn, I hissed, watching as someone barked orders. The guns were returned, and they turned towards the trees, ready to make the trek back to the cars and bring everything back to the labs.

I liked the ridge, the view of the valley making it easy to spot danger. A wolf howled somewhere behind me, the owls beginning to hoot and the birds finally going to bed. The dark began to shadow over the mountains, the moon dazzling in the night sky.

I glanced down at my hands, running my fingers over the scratch marks left by the man. I looked down at the spot where he laid dead for the past twelve hours, now just an empty memory of a past murder.

I knew I should have felt remorse, deep down the old me knew that. Yet, I didn’t. I realized a long time ago that I no longer felt the way I used to. I didn’t give a shit about anything.

I remember reading about feral omegas a long time ago. I remember the section about the murderous drive and bloodlust that sent shivers down my spine. It was one of the things that both feral omegas and alphas had in common. The killing, and the complete and utter dismissiveness of it all.

***

The forest was dark.

The flashlight didn’t do much to help with the pitch black that was around the brothers. When they made it to the spot where William was found, Dean wasn’t sure what to think. If Y/N had stuck around the area, she would’ve been well hidden. But if not, he’d have to find more clues.

The wind changed, and a new smell found its way to his nose. It was bitter, but had a hint of sweetness to it. But it was there; the distinct smell of an omega.

He tensed up, the smell of a beginning heat mixed with something tangier and sour put him on edge, but he knew who the floral, fresh scent belonged to. The sweet scent, the one he had memorized, had haunted him for what felt like ages. And the elation he felt was not even close to the relief.

He took off towards the smell, leaving Sam behind in his haste. The younger Winchester followed quickly, he too smelling the scent that no doubt put his brother on edge. He watched the alpha look around frantically, watched as he climbed up a portion of rocks to get onto a cliff, only to climb up a bit more onto a flat surface.

The trees were thinner up the mountain, snow falling steadily. The brothers shivered despite the layers they wore, and they flinched at the howl of a wolf, the echo eerie in the dark.

A twig snapped behind them, and they twisted around, Dean swallowing thickly at the gold eyes staring back at him.

***

They found me. In particular, he found me. The one person who I wanted to see the least.

I was sat back on my haunches, simply watching. No matter how much the omega in me wanted to rip his throat out for hurting me, for going against our bond, I couldn’t. He was my true mate, and the omega couldn’t ignore that fact, no matter how hard it tried.

Dean swallowed thickly, eyes boring into mine. My fingers subconsciously raised to run over the raised mark on my neck, the raised scar soft, but a reminder I was claimed by an alpha who I wasn’t good enough for.

I itched to lunge at him. But I didn’t. I couldn’t. I whined, sounding more like a kitten in pain than anything else, and backed up into the trees.

“No, Y/N please,” Dean said, taking a few steps closer. I shook like a leaf, from the cold and the strain it took not to let the anger win. It pulsed through my veins violently, Diana’s seductive voice ringing in my ear, the image of Dean’s flannel draped over her bed post.

But something else pulsed through me as well. Pain. I tried to push that feeling down, ever since I had left. But seeing him allowed me to get a good look at what I was missing.

Because even though he broke my heart, I still loved him with each and every shattered piece of it. My body ached to go to him, physically sore from the strain it took not to scent my mate. But I couldn’t give in that easily. And the feral omega within me didn’t want that. She was angry. Angry at Dean, at Diana, even at Sam, who had done nothing but sit in the unknown with me. My heart pounded; throbbing in my chest, pulling me towards him, our bond still strong even if he had broken my trust. Because I loved him. And it was that weakness that kept me from fully letting go.

“No!” I growled. I was crouched into a defensive stance, claws gleaming in the moonlight as I let out a low snarl, lip curling back over my fangs. “Alpha.”

“Yes, it’s me. I-I’m so, so sorry, baby. Truly, I am. I just… I need you to come home. I can get you better, I can. Just… just please come with me. You’re heat is starting, I can smell it, and it’s dangerous for feral omegas. And I-I miss you so much,” Dean said, his voice shaking. I narrowed my eyes at him, tilting my head in confusion.

“You hurt me,” I grunted. I flexed my fingers, lowering to place my palms on the ground.

“I-I know, baby. I know. And I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you. But I need you to come home.”

He wasn’t expecting what happened next.

He recoiled in surprise as I suddenly laughed. He furrowed his brows in both confusion and fear, watching as I nearly bent in half by the force of my laughter. I licked at my fangs, taking deep breaths to calm myself.

“Home? Ha!” I scoffed. He looked me up and down, taking in the dirt and blood covered clothes, his flannel from Diana’s house draped over my shoulders. He swallowed thickly. “No home. Not for me. You hurt me- will never happen again.”

My clipped sentences made enough sense to him to cause tears to spring to his eyes. His hands shook slightly, and he took a few more steps towards me.

“Y/N… please,” he whispered. “I can’t… I can’t live with myself as is. Please come home.”

“No.”

“Omega,” he said, a little more harshly. I flinched, blinking a few times as my eyes burned brighter. As he said that, something in me clicked, and I stumbled back a few paces, brows pinched together as I took heaving breaths. The world became slightly clearer as his authority ran over my skin, the pull towards him strong. But the anger that had bottled within me finally slipped out, spilling some of the words that I tried to contain in my head, my eyes turning back onto him.

“Did you used to call Diana that?” I sneered, a full sentence slipping past my lips for the first time since going feral. I slowly stood up, straightening my back and broadening my shoulders, my jaw tight as I wiggled my claws, cracking the knuckles and my neck. He set his jaw, tucking his gun into the back of his jeans before stalking towards me. I kept my ground, only a few inches from him now.

“I never once called her that,” he said lowly. “That title was reserved for you… and only you.”

“Knot her?”

He swallowed, taking a deep breath before he looked away. I licked my lips, waiting for an answer. He took a few moments to reply, and when he did, it shattered my heart even more.

“It was a mistake, Y/N. I know that,” he said.

“That… should be reserved for mates, Dean,” I said, my voice raspier than normal. He winced at how deep it had gotten. “But you betrayed me! I gave you everything. Everything! You were my first everything! My true mate! Did that mean nothing to you?!”

“It means everything to me, Y/N. It still does. You’ve gotta understand that,” he said, his face pleading.

“That makes no fucking sense!” I yelled, eyes swirling brilliantly with gold, the signature look of a feral omega or alpha; the eyes. He stared into them, fear and hope written in the spring green. I backed up a few paces, hands adjusting the backpack I had taken. “I hope you think long and fucking hard about what you’ve done, Dean. ‘Cause it’s your fault I’m like this now.” I smiled sinisterly, a low hiss escaping past the fangs. “And I sure as hell fucking like it.”

I winked, lowering back onto my haunches to spring into the trees, allowing the wind for a second time to carry me from the alpha who I loved so much; the same one who had hurt me beyond anything that you could imagine.

***

Dean watched her go, too frozen in place to follow. She was so different… so wild. Her scent had changed so drastically, but it still had the slight twang that was still ‘Y/N.’

Dean knew he fucked up. He knew that the mistake he made would forever have lasting consequences. And he knew that there was nothing he could do to ever repay her.

Sam took off, sprinting after Y/N. Once Dean snapped out of it, he followed, his boots crunching the frozen leaves and pine needles underneath his feet. He maneuvered around trees and ducked beneath low branches, desperate to catch up to his omega and bring her home.

He followed her scent, but she was too fast. Her newfound speed carried her far from him, and he began to lose hope. A dark thought crept into his mind; one that he might never get his old omega back. And that thought alone nearly crippled him.

“I don’t see her,” Sam said, panting. The brothers had stopped now, snow beginning to drift from the sky and land softly on their lashes. “Do you?”

“No,” Dean replied, shaking his head. “But I… I gotta find her.”

“We will, Dean,” Sam said, placing a hand on his brother’s shoulder. “We know she’s around here somewhere. And you said it yourself- she’s probably going to start heading towards her old town, right? Where she went to school?”

Dean swallowed, eyes still trained on the dark of the trees. “Yeah.”

“Okay, then if we start to lose her scent, we’ll head there. We’ll beat her to the punch and hopefully catch her before she can do anymore damage,” Sam said.

Dean turned to look at his brother, a hurt expression on his face. “You sound as though she’s just an animal to… to catch and tame. She’s my omega, Sam.”

“I-I know that, Dean. But she’s feral. She’s already killed two people- that we know of! It’s not long before she’s too far gone.”

“Don’t say that,” Dean muttered. “She’s not just something we take to the fucking pound, okay? She’s not a wild animal. She’s just… she’s my omega and I’m going to bring her back to me.”

Sam nodded. “I know you will, Dean. I didn’t mean it like that.”

Dean closed his eyes, sighing deeply before turning his head up to the sky, snow settling on the tip of his nose. “God. What the fuck have I done?”


	10. Chapter 10

Like a gentle wind, fingertips brushed ever so lightly against my cheek, soft strokes soothing me as I began to rouse. I could feel his heat, the energy radiating off of him, and his scent was mouthwatering. 

I arched towards him inadvertently, body reacting to his close presence after being away for so long. With my eyes still closed, I reached my hands out, searching for him. When my fingers finally ran over his flannel-covered chest, I hummed, curling into him. His hand dropped to my head, and he stroked my hair softly, eliciting a purr from deep in my chest.

“My omega,” he cooed, lips so close to my head I could feel his breath. I nuzzled my face into the crook of his neck, breathing deeply in order to scent him. “Did someone miss me?”

I nodded against him, and a chuckle rumbled in his chest. 

“I can see that,” he whispered, finally touching his lips to the top of my head. “I missed you, too.”

I smiled, eyes finally fluttering open. I tilted my head back, gazing into his green irises before craning up to press my lips to his.

“Three weeks is too long to be away from you, ‘mega,” Dean said.

“Maybe you’ll have to take me along next time,” I murmured, lips pressing against the underside of his chin.

“Maybe,” he said softly. I felt him stiffen, his arms tensing around me before his muscles relaxed, and he allowed my touch to comfort him. 

“Maybe.”

***

I jerked awake at the sound of a twig snapping. The dream had been so real, I could almost feel his touch. But I suppose that was because it was real, a memory forgotten along with numerous others that melted away the more I lost myself.

I sat up, scanning the area, scenting the air to see if I could find the source to the broken twig. I wondered if Dean had found me already, not knowing whether or not he’d give up. I doubt he would. Now that Diana was gone, he had no one else to fuck through his ruts.

I sighed, slinging the backpack up onto my shoulders. I took off in a light jog, the cool air settling the freshly fallen snow into a crisp blanket of ivory. The sunlight gleamed like a million tiny diamonds on the unbroken surface, and the sun stayed hidden behind a thick layer of clouds, creating an even chillier feel to the air.

Another twig snapped, and I stopped. Now I knew something was following me, for that couldn’t be a coincidence. I scent the air again, the wind shifting to allow me to catch a musky, earthy scent. A non-human scent.

I turned around slowly, eyes peering into the trees to find the animal, the predatory energy coming off of it not quite intimidating, but curious. I was beginning to become irritated until I turned back around, gasping.

Matching gold eyes peered at me in wonder. It was only a few feet away, and its ears perked up and listened intently for any signs of a threat. It stared at me, the wind blowing its fur softly, my hair going with it, and it lowered its muzzle, sniffing the ground a few feet from me.

I crouched slowly, careful not to startle it. That didn’t stop the creature from snorting, but it moved closer, nose now buried in the snow as it scented the ground. 

I ever so slowly raised my hand, palm up towards it. It wasn’t fear I felt, but exhilaration. The beast in front of me raised its head, gazing at me curiously. It didn’t move for a moment, our eyes staying locked on each other until it moved a bit more, muzzle now mere inches from my palm. And when it pressed its nose to my skin, I shuddered at the warmth, a small smile creeping onto my lips. I slowly moved my hand over its fur and to the top of its head, petting it softly. Its eyes fell closed and its neck craned into my hand, a soft purr rumbling from deep inside the animal’s chest.

The alpha scent coming off the wolf wasn’t intimidating in the slightest, and he wasn’t skittish around a feral omega. With their hierarchy much like ours, the scents could be exchanged between the species, and he felt comfortable enough to do so.

“Hey, boy,” I whispered. His gold orbs flickered over to me, and his tongue flicked out to lap at my arm. 

It was like a scene from a fantasy novel. The wolf moved to rub its head against my arm and shoulder, walking around me before nuzzling into my hand again. There was no worry, no fear. I felt safe, like there was finally something that understood me. The way the wolf moved, the way he looked at me and allowed me to scent him, made me think that he trusted me.

Suddenly, a shot rang out. I jumped, the bullet missing the wolf by inches, and I quickly moved in front of it, crouched down as he lowered his muzzle and growled.

“Y/N!” Dean called. The wolf pawed at the ground, hissing and licking its chops at the human alphas across the field. I swallowed thickly, sparing a glance at the wolf before turning and sprinting into the trees.

It didn’t take long for him to follow.

I ran easily, long strides matching those of the wolf as he weaved through the trees with me. I knew that Dean wouldn’t hesitate to shoot the wolf, and I glanced down for a moment to see it still running with me. He was beautiful, and I wished I could spend more time with him.

I stopped, crouching down again. The wolf stopped too, panting as he whined. I raised my hands, running them over his fur.

“You got to go, boy. It’s not safe with me,” I said, giving him one last pet. I stood up, moving my hands in a “shoo” motion. “Go on. Go.”

He whined again, and I looked over my shoulder to see Dean catching up, Sam not too far behind.

“Go!” I said, pushing at him. Giving me one last lick to my hand, he turned and sprinted off into the trees.

Which is when a body suddenly crashed into me.

I landed roughly onto the snow, head bashing into a tree root as hands gripped my wrists and held them above my head. My vision dotted and I struggled underneath Dean, but his grip was firm.

“Enough, Omega!” He said, gripping my wrists impossibly tighter, to the point where I knew I would have bruises. I bucked underneath him, snapping my teeth at him, but it was no use.

“Get off of me,” I said. “I don’t want you!”

“Yes, you do!” He hissed. “I’m sorry, okay? But you need to come home. You’re going to get yourself killed.”

“Has it crossed your mind that maybe that’s the point?” I asked. That took him off guard, his mouth dropping in shock at my words. I took advantage of his hesitation and pushed him off me, scrambling to my feet and dashing off into the trees, knowing that at this rate, I would easily outrun them.

***

I hadn’t been back in this town for a year.

Tommy’s bar was still thriving, and I looked down at what I was wearing.

I snagged a pair of jeans and a flannel from a girl taking a short cut down an alleyway. I knew my clothes weren’t going to cut it, and with the way her throat had been unceremoniously ripped open, she wouldn’t be needing them anyway. I knew it wasn’t the best idea, but I needed to see him.

I walked across the street, knowing that the bar would be nearly empty by this time of night. It was almost closing, and when I walked through the doors, almost every head turned in my direction.

I ignored the whispers and walked over to the bar, eyes searching for Tommy. I knew I must have stunk of an Omega in heat, and the ferality, but I didn’t care. I waited at the bar, teeth biting into my lip.

“Y/N?” Tommy asked. I turned, small smile making its way onto my lips.

“Tommy,” I breathed. 

“Are you alright?” He said, concern written across his features. “What happened to you?”

“Long story,” I muttered, brushing my hair from my face. I knew I must have looked like a mess, and I smoothed my hair down as best I could. “Just wanted to see you.”

“Look, Y/N. Feral Omegas aren’t allowed in public places… you’re my friend but if you don’t leave, I’m going to have to call the police,” he said slowly. I tilted my head.

“I don’t understand.”

“You need to-”

“Holy shit!”

I growled at the voice, turning to see Alex gaping at me. My lip curled back over my teeth as he laughed, clapping his hands together.

“I fucking knew it! You’ve gone feral!” He doubled over as laughter shook his body, arm grabbing his stomach, face turning red. “I called it! I knew it!”

“Alex, that’s enough,” Tommy said. Alex ignored him, and I growled again. “Y/N, you need to leave.”

I turned to him, eyes pleading. I bit my lip, wanting to talk to him. He always made me feel better, he’d always talk me out of something bad. 

“Look, meet me here when we close, okay? We’ll go up to the apartment, and we’ll talk then.” He gave me a soft, hesitant smile. I gave a short nod, giving one last glance around the bar that had fallen silent, and dashed from the premises, unaware of the alpha following me.

I turned the corner, seeing the hand of the girl I left in the alley behind the dumpster. I sighed, raking a hand through my dirty hair before I was spun around by another hand.

“You fucking crazy cunt.” 

Alex’s fist flew towards my face, and had my senses and reflexes not been spiked, it would’ve collided. But my hand shot up and caught his before it could make contact, and I smirked as a flash of fear crossed his features. Before he could react, and I was raking my claws down his cheek, and he let out a scream of pain. I watched with elation as he backed away, hand against his cheek as I let go of him, blood seeping through his fingers.

“Oh, you’re going to get it now, bitch,” he said. “Just you wait.”

He turned around to stalk off, and I slumped against the wall, ready to wait until Tommy was ready to talk.

***

Dean knew there was one place to go. One place he was sure she would go.

“Excuse me?” He said, sitting at one of the stools. “Timmy?”

The man behind the counter turned, dyed platinum hair white under the silver hanging lights of the bar. He had gold-lined eyes, tattoos lacing up and down his arms, and a ring on each finger. He raised a brow.

“Tommy?” He corrected.

“Right, sorry,” Dean said. 

Tommy tilted his head. “Hold on… I know you.”

“We never properly met,” Dean said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Dean Smith, Y/N Y/L/N’s Alpha.”

Recognition flashed across Tommy’s face, and his eyes widened. “That’s right, you’re the one that picked her up and carried her outta here.” He rubbed his forehead. “Is she okay? Did something happen to her? I haven’t heard from her in a while.”

Dean shared a quick glance with Sam. “She uh… No, she’s not okay.” Dean shook his head.

“She’s gone feral,” Sam said softly, lowering his voice so other patrons wouldn’t hear. Tommy’s eyes nearly popped from his skull, and he dropped the rag he was holding to brace his forearms on the bar.

“What? Are you sure?” He asked.

“Yeah, we’re pretty damn sure,” Dean snapped. Tommy ignored his tone and ran a hand down his face.

“Is there anything I can do?” He asked. Sam sighed.

“Not much,” he said truthfully. “But we have a sneaking suspicion that she’s going to show up here. She’s been heading this way and she has ties here.”

“If you see her, call us. Immediately,” Dean said. “And whatever you do, don’t tell her we showed up here.”

“Feral Omegas aren’t allowed in public spaces,” Tommy said. “But what if I ask her to come back, when we’re closed. That way the conversation will be private and we won’t cause a scene.”

Dean nodded. “Sure. That works. Just whatever you do, don’t provoke her. Stay calm. It’ll be intimidating but call us and we’ll be right here, okay?” He slid over a card with his number on it, and Tommy nodded his head once.

“Got it,” he said.

“Thanks, man.” Sam said, giving him a small smile.

And not twenty minutes later, Dean got a call from a frantic and distraught Tommy.

***

Sneaking up the fire escape, I slowly pushed open the window. The lock had been broken for as long as I could remember, and I always remembered Tommy complaining about it. And luckily for me, he hadn’t fixed it yet.

I landed on my feet in his bedroom, a sleeping Andy snoring away on the bed. I wrinkled my nose at the scent of mixed Alpha and Omega, and silently made my way out of the room, closing the door softly, and into the living room.

The bar should’ve been closed twenty minutes ago, and Tommy was still nowhere to be found. My eyes wandered the small flat, taking in the plants on the window sill, the pictures on the walls. Smiling faces burned themselves into my mind, and when I landed on a picture of me and Tommy, out faces bright and a drunken laughter dancing from our lips, I frowned. 

My frown deepened at the photograph of Tommy and Andy’s wedding, realizing I wasn’t invited to it.

I wondered what other things I missed from packing up and leaving without another word to Kansas. Sure, Tommy and I stayed in touch, but I suppose not to this extent. He was my best friend before everything happened, and even though I didn’t truly care, a small part of me was still hurt that he didn’t bother to invite me to his wedding with his Omega.

The front door opened, and my head snapped towards it as I lowered myself a bit. Tommy walked in, his cellphone to his ear.

“I should be meeting her now,” Tommy said, voice low and quiet. I cocked my head in confusion. He paused, running a hand over his face. “Come quick, okay? I’ve got my Omega here and I don’t want him hurt… I don’t know… I’ll be fine… Okay, see you soon, Dean.”

My breath hitched in my throat. Dean? Tommy called him? My eyes narrowed into slits as I slunk back into the shadows. A low growl escaping my lips. 

Tommy jumped at the sound, whipping around to face me. “Y/N?” His eyes were wide with fear. “How’d you get in?”

My eyes flickered to his bedroom door. He swallowed thickly.

“The window…” He shook slightly, his next question pleading. “You didn’t hurt Andy, did you?”

“No,” I said. I lowered onto my haunches, watching him with a sneer. “You told him.”

“I-I… Dean asked me to call him if I saw you and… Y/N, you’re feral. You need to nest, you need help.”

“No!” I snarled. “Not him!”

“Why not? He’s your Alpha!” Tommy said. “You’re his Omega! You’re literally soulmates. Don’t you want to be with him?” 

“Not him,” I repeated. “I got away.”

“Why?” He pushed. “Did he do something? What happened?”

I huffed.

“Y/N, what did he do?” He said again. “Please, just tell me. No, you know what? He is your Alpha. No matter what he did, you two belong together.”

I shook my head. “No.”

“Yes! You’re true mates. You found your perfect person. That’s so rare. I love Andy, I truly do, but he’s not my true mate. You found yours. Don’t let him go. I know he cares about you, why else would he come looking?”

“I killed his bitch,” I hissed. “Needs a place to stuff his knot.”

Tommy visibly gulped. “You killed someone?”

I tilted my head. “Not one.”

He gasped, taking a step back. “Why?”

I stood up then, taking a step forward. “Why’d you call Dean?”

“He asked me to,” Tommy muttered. “Made me promise.”

“You told him where I was,” I said. “I don’t want that.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N. But you need help!” Tommy pressed.

“Stop saying that!” I yelled, pushing him back. 

“No! Because you do! The Y/N I know never would’ve killed a person. She never would’ve abandoned her family-”

“I don’t have a family!” I pushed him back again. However, this time I used my claws, and he hissed in pain as I scratched him. Blood began to trickle down his V-neck, and my lip curled back over my teeth.

“You do!” He said. “You have Sam!”

“Stop!”

“And you have your Alpha! You have Dean!”

“No I don’t!” I screeched. I grabbed his collar, spinning around and throwing him back into the living room. He soared through the air, crashing into the coffee table. “You told him!”

The bedroom door opened at the sound, and a sleepy Andy stepped out. “What the hell is going on?” His eyes met mine. “Y/N?”

“Andy, go inside and lock the door!” Tommy said, his temple dripping blood.

“Tom, what’s going on?” Andy asked. I abandoned Tommy, instead turning on Andy. Tommy scrambled to his feet as he saw what was happening, and Andy didn’t have time to react before my hand was soaring through the air, my claws ripping through his chest. He let out a scream of agony, and I used my other hand to tear at his throat, a spray of blood hitting my face.

“No!” Tommy screamed. Andy collapsed, choking on his own blood as I turned to my old friend, tears streaming down his face as painful sobs racked his body. “Andy!”

I stalked towards him, bending down and picking him up by his neck. He looked at me wide eyed, hands grabbing at my wrist as my newfound strength allowed me to dangle him off the ground.

“Traitor,” I hissed.

The door was kicked open behind me, two sets of booted feet running inside. 

“Omega! Stop!” Dean ordered. I looked over my shoulder and growled, feeling Tommy start to go limp.

“Help… her,” he choked out, air supply running nearly on empty. 

“Y/N, don’t do this!” Dean said, cocking his gun. “Please, Omega. I don’t want to have to use this.”

I furrowed my brows, letting out a twisted laugh. He looked taken aback, and I kept my eyes locked on his emerald ones as I brought my hand up, claws out, and shoved it into Tommy’s chest, a scream erupting from the Alpha in my hand and a “no!” from the two Alphas by the door. 

“Traitor,” I repeated, jerking my hand back, Tommy’s heart in my hand. His body went limp, and I dropped it to the ground, not even blinking when Dean pulled the trigger.


	11. Chapter 11

The bullet soars through the air, not giving me enough time to move out of the way. I yelp as it lodges itself in my shoulder, my hand coming up to the wound, blood already streaming from my fingers.

As I look down, I realize not all the blood on my hands is mine. The body beneath me is lifeless and vacant, and something bubbles in my chest. Something I hadn’t felt since turning feral.

Guilt.

I drop to my knees, trying to wrap my head around the fact I killed my best friend and his mate. I was so consumed by anger, I hadn’t realized what I was doing. I go to move my arms, wincing as one shoots burning pain through my body, and hover my hand over Tommy’s chest.

“Tommy,” I said quietly. “No, no, no.”

Dean watches in confusion as tears began to pool in my eyes, and I lay my forehead on Tommy’s chest. “No!”

Dean steps forward, a hand landing on my shoulder. I snap at him, growling loudly and he rears back. He sees the tears in my eyes, sees how I turn back to Tommy, the horror and hurt written clearly across my face.

“What did I do?” I mutter, reaching up to move a curl from Tommy’s face. His gold lined eyes are staring up at the ceiling, and I move to close them. 

I stiffen as I hear movement outside in the hall. I look up, eyes narrowing as I scent another Alpha.

When Alex comes into view, I growl, lips curling back over my teeth. The brothers turn, Dean snarling as he sees the man he wanted to kill the first time he saw him.

“You crazy bitch,” Alex says, shaking his head. He steps inside, eyes trained on Tommy. “What the fuck is wrong with you? I always knew you’d end up like this.”

“Get the fuck out,” Dean said, taking a step forward. 

Alex laughs. “Looky here, I didn’t think you’d last so long with her.”

“I won’t repeat myself,” Dean spat, gun still in his hand. He raises it slightly. “Now go.”

In a flash, Alex’s foot connects with Dean’s gut, and his hand flies out to grasp at the gun in Dean’s hand. Within seconds, the gun is up and pointed at me, the trigger pulled towards me for the second time that night. 

The bullet lodges itself in my lower abdomen, and I collapse backwards as a fire begins to lick at my insides. I let out a roar of pain, and snarl as Alex moves the gun to Dean.

Sam acts fast, charging at Alex and landing a solid punch to his jaw. Alex retaliates, using the butt of the gun to hit Sam’s temple, knocking him on his ass. Dean stands back up, but Alex takes a shot at him, too, the bullet making its home in Dean’s leg.

I jump to my feet, and coil in a predatory stance. All conscious eyes turn at the low growl, Dean’s eyes widening as he spots the large red spot on my shirt. 

“Mine,” I snarl, readying to pounce.

“Jesus, you won’t stop, will you?” Alex asks, raising the gun again. Before he can pull the trigger, I’m leaping through the air, claws out and sinking into his chest as we both fall to the ground. The gun clatters from his hand, head smacking against the floor as we land, and I wrap my hand around his throat. 

“You hurt my mate,” I said, squeezing tighter. Alex begins to panic, and he tries to buck me off, but I rake my nails down his face again. “You will pay for that.”

I raise my hand to strike, claws sharp and fierce, but Dean wastes no time in grabbing the gun, moving to hoist me up and literally throw me to the side before he presses the muzzle of the gun against Alex’s forehead.

“I’ve been wanting to do this for a very long time,” Dean hisses. Alex raises a fist, but Dean easily catches it. “You’ve been a pain in my ass since the minute I met you.”

Without hesitation, he pulls the trigger, and Alex quickly fades. I’m on my haunches, and throughout the whole ordeal, I slowly began to get more sluggish. With two bullet wounds, both of which are losing blood fast, I began to feel myself fade. My eyes flutter as I lose my balance and fall over, breath beginning to labour.

“Shit!” Dean curses, climbing off of Alex and sliding over to me. “Okay, come on, sweetheart.”

I tried to keep my eyes open, but they continued to go out of focus and flutter shut. Sam began to rouse again, and I heard scuffling and talking as I began to lose consciousness. The last thing I remember was the feeling of cool, metal handcuffs latching around my wrists and someone picking me up into their arms before I was out cold.

***

Heat.

Sweltering, boiling heat.

I’m hot. Too hot.

My skin feels as if it’s on fire and by body feels like an open flame.

I try to move my arms but they won’t work. My fingers are stiff and sore, my eyes are glued shut, my mouth full of cotton.

Where am I?

There’s a familiar scent, one that brings both a sense of peace and anger. 

Where the hell am I?

There’s an ache in my shoulder and abdomen, the one above my hip much more prominent than my shoulder. I hear the slow drip of something onto tile, steady like a heartbeat, consistent like phases of the moon.

A door opens and closes roughly in the distance, and I dig in my mind to remember where I was. My wrists begin to hurt, like they’re chaffed, and it takes all of my power to open my eyes just a crack to peak at them.

They’re cuffed to a chair.

I jerk, suddenly wide awake, and look around frantically. I’m in the bunker, inside the dungeon. The scent was Dean’s, and the dripping was my blood.

How could I have been so stupid as to get caught? I had covered my tracks well enough. Or at least I thought I did. I was heading up to Washington, I was going to see…

Tommy.

Oh shit, Tommy!

I gasp as I remember what happened. Scenes flood into my mind behind my eyes, and I begin to choke up enough that I can’t breathe as I see what I did to Tommy and Andy. I can feel their skin tear and bones break, I could smell their blood; taste it.

It made me sick.

A tear slipped down my cheek, and it was the first time I allowed myself to cry in weeks. I typically didn’t want to- didn’t need to. Because I didn’t care. I was pulled so far into ferality that I didn’t give a fuck about whose throat I ripped out and whose bones I felt crunch under my hand. But it was different with Tommy. He was not only my best friend, but he was like my brother. 

And I killed him.

I didn’t move as the door opened and the bookshelves were pushed aside. I didn’t move as Dean lifted my shirt just slightly and removed the bloody gauze and tape to apply new ones. I didn’t wince when he prodded at my injuries, making sure none were infected. He cleaned the blood from my fingertips where the crimson was dripping from, and ran a gentle hand through my hair.

I sighed in relief as he left. But scowled when he came back.

He wasn’t empty handed.

In his arms were a pile of flannels, a few blankets and a pillow. I couldn’t see his face through the stack, but I watched from the corner of my eye as he began to scatter the items through the room, his scent beginning to grow.

I wasn’t sure what he was doing, but once he draped a flannel on the chair by my head, I growled.

He ignored me.

He continued to leave and come back with armfulls of his clothes and my clothes. The scents began to overwhelm me, and my head began to spin at the intensity of my mate’s scent. However, whenever he came close, I’d snap at him. He didn’t seem shaken by it, though, and he kept quiet throughout the whole thing.

I titled my head as he left again, coming back with sleeping bags. And the last time he came back, Sam was with him, both carrying a mattress into the room. They set it down against one of the walls, and Sam left. Dean went to the door, closing it.

“Sam! It’s time, man,” he called through the door. I heard the sound of keys jingling on the other side, and I heard the locks clicking. Dean turned then, finally making eye contact with me, and slowly walked towards me.

I jerked as his hands went to my bound wrists, and my eyes widened as I saw the small key.

Was he not worried I’d attack him? He saw what I could do, and as he gently unlocked each cuff, I finally got a good look at him. His brows were furrowed and lines made themselves at home on his forehead. His lips were pursed, a beard forming on his face, and he looked paler than usual. 

He took a few steps back when he was finished, and I sat watching him. We simply stared at each other for a few moments, before he spoke.

“Nesting,” he said. I tilted my head in confusion and he continued. “It’s what feral Alphas and Omegas need in order to return to their previous selves. So,” he leaned back against the bookshelf. “We’re stuck in here together until you’re better.”

“You’re not afraid?” I asked.

He let out a breathy laugh. “For you, yes. For me, not so much. I don’t care what happens to me. I know this is my fault.”

I snarled at the thought of Diana, and brought my knees up to my chest. 

“When you come back to yourself, you’re going to be different. I know that, and I think you know that deep down. But… everything that happened was on me. You couldn’t contain yourself. It was the animal inside you- what’s inside all of us, no matter if you’re an Alpha or an Omega. It doesn’t matter. Ferality changes you.” He took a deep breath. “And I changed you. I forced you into this and I will never be able to make it up to you. Not for what I did, not for what it caused you to do… to become… none of it. And I’m so, so sorry.”

I swallowed thickly, thinking of Tommy and how I will never see him again. Thinking of how I murdered his mate in front of him before doing the same to him. No matter what Dean said, I knew it was my fault. I couldn’t contain myself, I couldn’t keep myself from turning. I was weak. I wasn’t meant for this. I wasn’t meant to be an Omega, let alone Dean’s Omega. I was born wrong, and I was fucked in the head. I murdered people, innocents who didn’t deserve it. I murdered people who did me wrong, but still didn’t deserve for their life to end. Dean could blame himself all he wants, but I knew, and so did everyone else, who was to blame.

Me.

***

I hadn’t moved from the chair. 

Dean was laying on the mattress, arm behind his head as he stared up at the ceiling. I was exhausted, and needed sleep, but I was afraid to go to Dean.

I felt the itch under my skin begin to dull, the fire begin to flicker out as the scent surrounded me. It seemed as though being locked in a room with my mate and our scent was all it took to begin to fade the ferality inside me. 

I looked over at him, and the mattress, wanting to lay beside him and sleep for ages. But I couldn’t. He looked at peace for the first time since Sam locked the door, and I didn’t want to disturb him.

Leave it to Dean to know exactly what I was thinking.

“Baby, come over here and sleep,” he murmured, head turning towards me to meet my eyes. I spun my head around to face forward, flushing. “I know you’re tired. It’ll be fine.”

I wanted to, but a part of me also wanted to stay as far away from him as possible. He lied to me, and betrayed me. I knew he didn’t love me like he said he did, or else he wouldn’t have been with Diana. It still hurt, because I loved him so much. I couldn’t feel it anymore, or at least not yet, but I knew I did. And I knew I was angry and hurt because of him. And I knew that I wouldn’t be able to trust another lover because of him.

Would I leave? Once I was better? We were mated, we were true mates, and he did the one thing to absolutely betray my trust in a relationship. How was I supposed to reconcile with him after that? How could I see a future with him when there was the possibility he would also be with someone else?

“Y/N,” he said quietly. My ears perked up. “Please.”

I sighed, closing my eyes for a moment. “No.”

“Why not?” He asked. “You’re tired, I know you are. And we need to be closer together in order for you to get better. I’m not asking to hold you or-or to touch you in any way, but please baby… come sleep.”

I bit my tongue, and reluctantly got up from the chair. I stood for a moment, hesitating, before turning and making my way to the bed. He was close to the wall, so I sat and laid as far away as possible, laying on my back to stare at the ceiling. I felt his eyes one me, but one growl and his eyes turned away.

I wasn’t sure what was to come in the morning, all I knew was that if the awkwardness in the room continued, I’d end up bashing my head into the fucking wall. He was trying, I knew that, even confused by that, but I still didn’t know what I would do once I was no longer feral. Leaving was what I pondered the most, but he was my true mate, and I loved him so much. Fuck, did I love him. But how was I supposed to live with him, share my bed with him, when he had been with someone else for so long?

There was also the topic of the people I had killed. Guilt was already eating me alive about Tommy, and I never thought of myself as someone who was capable of murder. 

My head was a jumble of confusing thoughts, and I wondered how I could escape from this world. A world that had screwed me over too many times to count. How was I to live with myself after the horrors I had committed? How was I to live with or without Dean, the man who broke my heart but also kept it?

Maybe I didn’t have to. There was a way I could obliterate the feelings inside my head. A way I could take away the pain and the guilt.

I slept soundly knowing there was a way to finally ease myself away from a world that was always too cruel to me. I slept knowing I wouldn’t have to deal with the pain, guilt and heartbreak for much longer.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Dubcon/noncon. 18+ only!

I was running.

It was dark, stars filling the night sky and the moon shining brightly down onto the world below. The grass was still warm beneath my feet, even after the sun went down hours ago, and sweat dripped from the tip of my nose onto the top of my lip.

I could smell him. I could feel him. He wouldn’t let me be, and there was an itch that needed scratching. An itch that I knew could only be sated once he was dead.

I climbed quickly onto a large rock overlooking the woods. It wasn’t too high, but high enough where I would have the advantage. My skin was sticky and buzzing, my eyes a swirling gold so piercing, it would startle any predator caught in their gaze.

I howled at the large shape floating in the sky, its white light casting a glow upon my shimmery skin. The humid air made my shorts and tank top cling to my sweat soaked skin, my hair sticking to my forehead and the back of my neck. Any other person would be uncomfortable in this setting, but not me. I hadn’t even noticed the heat, for I had been wrapped in it for days without the promise of escape. Instead, another howl ripped through my throat, a piercing roar that bounced off the trees and through the leaves, warning other predators that this was my territory. 

My hands formed into the claws I once dreaded, the tips gleaming in the moonlight as I finally opened my eyes. The gold was startling, almost moving like a flowing liquid around my iris’. I snarled, teeth bared and sharp, my eyes zoning in on my target, his bewildered and horror stricken face trained on me. Emerald eyes bored into my swirling gold ones, and the sudden rush of anger and adrenaline surged through me. The memories and his words echoed in my head, and a ferocious growl made its way past my lips, making him flinch. Omegas were never paid much mind, never feared. But a feral omega wasn’t a force to be reckoned with. Before he could even think about reaching for his gun, I coiled and pounced, lunging through the air with my sharp claws extended outwards, trained on the throat of my alpha. 

I jerked awake, sweat beading my forehead and breaths coming in short gasps. I ran a hand through my hair and sat up, clenching my jaw and rolling my shoulders. I hadn’t slept that well in a long time, but the dream unsettled me. It was just that, a dream, for winter had long rolled around and in that dream, it was warm, but I could still feel the anger, the heat, the pure want to attack. 

I looked to my right, spotting Dean sitting in the chair I occupied the night before, staring at me. It wasn’t a scared stare, or a condescending stare, but a curious one. His eyes were trained on me with wonder, face contorted into a puzzled look that became deeper with each passing moment.

“Stop staring,” I snapped, twirling my head to face forward. I clenched my fists against my thighs, taking deep breaths to try and calm down.

“Sorry,” he murmured. I heard him take a breath and hold it for a moment before releasing. “I just missed you is all.”

I scoffed. “Likely.”

“It’s true,” he retorted, sitting up straighter in the chair. “I looked everywhere for you. Everywhere. I couldn’t… it was too hard being without you. You’re my world.”

“I’m not!” I said harshly. “I’m not your ‘world,’ because if I was, you wouldn’t have run to another Omega! Don’t give me that bullshit. You don’t love me. You don’t care for me. You obviously don’t want me as yours, or else you wouldn’t have gone to her. I don’t satisfy you, and I don’t give you what you need, because if I did, you wouldn’t wander. So please, spare me, because I can’t take the fucking bullshit anymore!”

The room was silent. 

So silent, you could hear a pin drop.

Dean closed his mouth, eyes wide and chest heaving as he stared at me. This time, the stare was cold and disheartening. His hands clenched the arms of the chair, and he licked his lips.

“Look, I don’t expect you to understand,” he said slowly. 

“I understand, Dean,” I said quietly. “Just say it. Tell me what was so shitty about me. Please. I need to know.”

“It’s not that,” he told me. “Diana is… was… gentle. Kind. She was the stereotypical Omega. She was submissive, quiet and meek. She wanted to raise a family and settle down with an Alpha she could provide for.” Dean cleared his throat and rubbed a hand down his face. “I met her at a bar one night. I was drunk. There was a bad hunt that Sam and I had finished and I was coming home to you, just needing you. But I saw the bar and needed the drink, too. So, about a half hour of booze, Diana shows up. She was all legs and ass, with these captivating blue eyes and long, brown hair. She was soft spoken and was about to start her heat. It was around the same time as your heat.”

I swallowed back my bile.

“Because I was drunk, I talked to her and flirted. Because I was an asshole, I didn’t think twice when she offered herself to me. I went back with her, and helped her through her four day heat. She was submissive and took a knot like a fucking porn star, but she wasn’t you. And once I sobered up the next day, I realized I made a mistake. But I kept with it.”

“I remember that,” I murmured. “I hit my heat and you were gone. Sam said you dropped him off at Jody’s for a few days while you headed home, but you called him to let him know you found a hunt. I remember the pain I felt. It was worse than any heat I had before meeting you or after you claimed me, almost as bad as the night I first met you. I never knew why, but now I know it was because my Alpha was rejecting me.”

“I wasn’t!” Dean said. “I would never.”

“It could’ve been your subconscious,” I said. “It doesn’t take much. But that was why I had become sick. I was being rejected.”

“I… after helping her the first time, I kept texting her and calling her. We hooked up a few more times after that, and I helped her through her heats if they weren’t the same time as yours. And before I knew it, we were in a relationship that neither one of us wanted to quit.”

I bit my lip and laid my cheek on my knee that was up against my chest, trying to will the nausea away.

“When Sam told me you knew I lost it,” he said. “I couldn’t believe it. I knew it would hurt you, and I knew it would fuck with you. But I didn’t realize how much.”

“Why wasn’t I enough?” I asked, tears filling my eyes. The nesting had begun to prove to work, and I began to feel like myself. Emotions began to swim back to me, and I could almost feel again.

Almost.

“You were. You are. But… you were rougher around the edges and you were different. I needed a change of scenery, I needed an Omega.”

The feeling slipped away, and I growled, leaping to my feet. I felt my eyes burn bright, and my claws sharpened. “I am an Omega. I was your Omega. I gave you everything I had. Everything! It may not have been much, but I damn well tried. I tried to be normal. I tried to control myself. I even went to a witch to see if she could fix me! I tried everything for you, and you threw it all away!”

“You… what?” He asked, eyes narrowed. “You went to a witch?”

I huffed out a breath, turning away from him slightly. “I wanted to be good for you. I asked her to make me normal. I asked her to take away whatever I had that prevented me from being a good Omega. But she said she couldn’t.”

“Why would you think to do that?” He asked.

“Because I could feel it! I could feel you rejecting me and neglecting me. It got to the point where I began to fall physically ill because of you. I thought that if I were different… then you’d love me. You know, you never said ‘I love you’ until that day in the woods.”

Dean was quiet, mulling over my words. He opened and closed his mouth, not knowing what to say to that, so I continued.

“It didn’t hit me until after. But it obviously was used as a way to get me to come with you. But all those times I told you I loved you… they weren’t reciprocated. You never told me you loved me.” I took a deep breath, before asking the dreaded question. “Did you love Diana?”

He went still, eyes tearing up at her name. I bit my lip in anticipation, watching the mental fight behind his eyes. Eyes that I loved so dearly. And when he looked up at me, guilt flashing across his features, I broke.

Maybe it was the fact I couldn’t handle it anymore, or that the nesting had worked much more than I thought, but suddenly a floodgate of buried emotions opened, and I collapsed back onto the bed, landing on my knees, as sobs racked my body. Dean hesitated a moment, before sitting back in the chair, watching me. I pressed onto my chest, right over my heart, wondering if maybe, just maybe, the pressure would relieve the pain was I feeling. My claim mark burned, and I felt it inside my body. I felt the pressure bubble in my belly, the pounding of drums inside my head, and suddenly, my claws retracted and my eyes faded to a somber bronze instead of enticing gold. I could see myself in the reflection of the cuffs on the chair, I could see the shift of the color. And I knew in that moment, the ferality was fading. I knew the scent and nesting was beginning to work, which meant it was only a matter of time before I felt everything again. Before I felt betrayal, guilt, fear and absolute heartbreak. 

“Y/N, I’m so sorry,” Dean whispered. My sobs had turned into silent cries, and I covered my mouth with my hand. “I didn’t mean to fall in love with another Omega. I didn’t mean to reject you. I didn’t mean any of it. Please, you have to understand. I love you. I do. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone. And I’m sorry I never said it to you. I’m sorry I never made you feel accepted as who you are or-or validated my feelings for you. I’m sorry.”

“It’s a little late for that,” I whispered. “Tommy is dead. Andy is dead. Fucking Alex and Diana, a poor, innocent old man who simply tried to help, and a girl who I killed just for her clothes. I… I’m a monster.”

I dropped my head into my hands, tears leaking through the cracks between my fingers.

“No, you’re not,” Dean said, crouching down in front of me. “I’ve seen real monsters. All of my life, I’ve fought them. I’ve seen pure evil, and I’ve seen good. We’ve all made mistakes, and it just so happened my mistake turned you into something you are not. But Y/N, you are good.”

“I killed people, Dean!” I yelled. “I murdered them in cold blood. That girl didn’t deserve it! That man didn’t deserve it! Tommy and Andy didn’t fucking deserve it. Not even Alex or Diana deserved for me to take their lives. I just… God, I hate myself!”

“Don’t!” Dean growled. He gripped my hands, pulling them to his chest. “Don’t you dare say that.”

“It’s true, Dean. I’m a killer. I deserve all this pain I’m feeling. I deserve you not loving me. I deserve-”

He cut me off with his lips. He pressed his mouth against mine with a bruising force, his hand cupping the back of my neck as his tears mixed with mine on my tongue. I let out a squeal that was muffled by his lips, and his other hand gripped my waist, pulling my flush against him. I knew I should push him away. I knew I shouldn’t be doing this, not with what he had done to me. But dammit, I craved him. He was like my own personal drug, one made simply to destroy me. And before I knew it, I was fisting my hands into his flannel and pulling him closer to me and down over me as I laid back. He moved the hand from my neck to my hip, his thumb rubbing circles over the exposed skin where my shirt had ridden up. His tongue licked into my mouth, and I parted my lips, tasting him and breathing him in as he pressed himself against me.

His hand moved lower to the waistband of my sweatpants, and he gently began to lower the fabric from my hips, cautiously. I barely noticed, too wrapped up in his scent and the overwhelming flood of emotions coming back to me. He broke away, only to move his lips to my jaw, sucking and kissing over my skin and down to my neck. He pulled my pants off, pushing my shirt up to bend down and kiss the skin beneath my breasts. I sighed as he lifted my shirt over my breasts to capture a nipple in his mouth. He unbuckled his belt and pushed his jeans down enough to free himself from his boxers. He quickly removed my panties, and positioned himself at my entrance. I began to tell him I wasn’t ready, that I wasn’t wet enough to take him, but he slammed himself inside me before I could say anything, ripping a cry of pain from my throat. He suckled at my pulse point, his hips stilling for a moment as he groaned.

“Fuck, you’re tight,” he sighed, gripping the side of my face harshly in order to crash his lips to mine again, eyes hazy and dark with lust. Sex with Dean never hurt. He was always tender and loving, unless otherwise discussed, but as he pulled out just enough that the tip of his prick was still inside me, just to slam back in, it felt as if sandpaper was rubbing itself against my walls.

I began to feel the anger again. The anger that had wrapped itself around me within the past few months bubbled to life under my skin. He was taking what he wanted, not bothering with preparing me or making sure I was at least ready for him. I felt my nails grow back to their claws, and my eyes burned a little brighter. I gripped Dean’s hair, yanking his face from mine, and held his head above me for a moment. He looked at me peculiarly, before widening his eyes at me.

I sunk my claws into his shoulder, a yell escaping him as I pushed him roughly off of me, blood now coating my nails. I winced as he was torn from me, and I already felt chafed and raw. I pulled up my underwear and pants. He looked up at me, chest heaving as he held his shoulder.

“I don’t-”

“If you say you don’t understand, I will rip out your lungs,” I hissed. He shut his mouth, and I stood over him menacing me. “What, you just think you can end a conversation by sticking your dick inside me? Did it even occur to you to make sure I was ready?”

“Y/N, I-”

“God, how could I be such an idiot?” I fisted my hands in my hair as I shook my head. “How could I let myself become so easily distracted?”

Dean stood up as he tucked himself into his boxers and buttoned his jeans. His belt was left undone, and he took a step towards me. 

“Don’t fucking touch me,” I said, tears sprining to my eyes. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I wasn’t thinking-”

“Yeah, I know!” I snapped. I leaned back against the wall, closing my eyes. “I wish things could go back to the way they were.”

Dean sighed. “That’s all I want. I just want you back.”

My eyes flashed open, and I tilted my head. I scoffed, realizing he misunderstood me. “No, dipshit. I wish I never met you.” He flinched. “I wish I never fucking met you, so then all those people who are dead would still be breathing, and I wouldn’t fucking feel like this, or-or be like this! You’d be happy with Diana, and I’d still be fighting off Alex’s hands and joking around with my best friend.”

Dean blinked back tears, but I couldn’t find it in myself to care. I was about to add something else, tell him that I wish I hadn’t fallen so deeply in love with him in order to prevent my heart from breaking, but a sharp pain shot through my abdomen. Within seconds, I broke into a sweat and began to convulse from the terrible pain ripping through me.

I knew what was happening. The ferality began to slip away, which meant it was no longer fighting off nature’s call. I cried out and fell forward, landing roughly on my shoulder as three times the pain coursed through me. 

I was going into heat.


	13. Chapter 13

Heat surged through my veins, burning me alive from the inside out. I hadn’t had a heat in nearly four months, and it all bottled up inside me, exploding as my ferality began to fade. I collapsed onto the mattress with a cry, squeezing my eyes shut as painful stabs of fire and cramps raged in my abdomen.

“Y/N!” Dean said, rushing to me. One of his hands cupped my cheek as the other gripped my waist, and I arched into his touch, the Omega in me desperately wanting her Alpha.

However, the feral Omega, and myself, didn’t.

“Get away from me,” I hissed, curling in on myself. “The last thing I need is you.”

He ignored me, pressing his palm to my forehead. “Shit. You’re hotter than normal.”

I let out a short laugh. “Thanks.”

“Now is not the time for your sarcasm, Y/N. This isn’t right,” Dean said. “Fuck.”

I let out a cry of anguish as I suddenly convulsed, sweat dripping from the tip of my nose to the bed. I keened, black spots dotting my vision as my head swam. This couldn’t be happening. Not now. Not after threatening Dean, not after he took me when I wasn’t ready and wouldn’t fucking stop.

“Y/N?” Dean said, hands on my shoulders now. I wanted to growl at him, I wanted to push him against the floor and hold my hands to his throat until the life faded from his eyes.

No, that’s not what I wanted. I loved him. I was so deeply in love with him that I blatantly ignored his previous wrongs against me. I put everything aside for him. I wanted to change for him.

I wanted to be perfect for him.

I sobbed.

They were silent sobs, eyes squeezed shut and tears leaking through as I held my chest. I pressed against my heart, feeling the rapid pulsing, feeling the dampness of my shirt as my sweat soaked through it. My body felt like an open flame in the midst of a rain storm that wouldn’t snuff out. I was being pushed further and further from ferality, therefore I was being pushed further and further into instability. 

It was all my fault.

“Y/N, you gotta say something, babe,” Dean pleaded, hands cupping my wet cheeks. “Please.”

“It’s all my fault,” I whispered, almost too silent to hear. Dean cocked his head.

“What, baby?”

I shrieked as suddenly the most painful cramp I had ever felt racked my abdomen, making my body surge and tense and jerk. I heard Dean let out a startled sound, and he wrapped his arms around me to keep me still.

“Sam!” 

His yells for his brother were fruitless. It was the dungeon, a soundproof room that wasn’t being opened for another few days. Dean would have to wait until his brother brought food to the room until he could plead for help.

However, we might not have that sort of time.

I let out a shuddering breath as my limbs began to tingle, my head growing increasingly fuzzy as my eyes rolled back into my head. I no longer had control of the spasms, and I would unwillingly lash out. Something was wrong. Something was very, very wrong.

***

It was cold.

Too cold.

My eyes flashed open, chills running through my body as I shivered violently.

I was in a tub of ice and cold water, in just my bra and panties, a thick padding of gauze and medical tape wrapped around my torso and shoulder. I gently lifted my arm to press at my shoulder wound, hissing at the contact. They were still sore, and I wondered how long I would have those scars for.

I looked up, Dean’s eyes worried, empty ice bags lying around the bathroom floor.

“Hey,” he choked. His eyes were teary, but he put a smile on his face. “There you are.”

“W-what happ-happened?” I asked. He reached behind him for a thermometer.

“You were unconscious for a while. When Sam came to drop off some food, I had him open the door. We took you down to the infirmary but there was nothing for you there except some anti-inflammatories. They didn’t reduce your fever at all and you continued to seize. You uh… you stopped breathing at one point.”

“What?” I breathed. “How long was I out f-for?” 

“Three days.”

My eyes widened. “Th-three days?”

“We’ve done this twice before. Your temperature lowers a bit each time but it climbs back up after a few hours. Baby… you have to let me help.”

My eyes narrowed, top lip quivering as it began to pull into a snarl. “No.”

“You are going to die, Y/N!” Dean said. “There is nothing else we can do!”

I gripped the sides of the tub, pushing up into a semi-stand. I wobbled a bit, and Dean jumped up.

“Hey, woah, what are you doing?” He asked.

“I’m getting out and away from you,” I said.

“No, you’re not!” He pushed me back down, water sloshing up over the sides. I shivered again, flinching at the cold. I pressed my hands against his stomach, pushing as I gripped the edge of the tub and hoisted myself up and over the side of it. Dean growled, trying to grab me and push me back in, but I kicked his knee, a grunt escaping him as I grabbed a towel, wrapping it around my shivering form and sitting up on the bathroom counter.

“Dammit, Dean!” I cursed. “You can’t control me!”

“I’m not letting you die. That’s not a fucking option.”

“Why not?” I blurted. His mouth was agape, eyes flickering between mine.

“Why not?” He echoed. “Because… because you’re my Omega!”

“And?” I pressed. I watched him closely, how he scoffed and rolled his eyes. How he avoided the question. He shook his head and looked away, breathing deeply through his nose. “You don’t have a good reason. Not one good reason as to why you want me alive. You just feel the need to save everyone, Dean. Well, newsflash; I don’t need saving. So let me get out, and go to my room, and let me die in fucking peace.”

“That’s not happening!” He hissed. “And I do have a good reason.”

“Oh yeah? And what’s that?” I asked.

He stepped in front of me, eyes locked on mine. Our faces were less than a foot from each other, chests heaving as the tension in the room escalated. I could feel my abdomen begin to seize again, and I bit my tongue to hold in my whimpers.

“I love you.”

“No,” I said. 

“Yes.”

“You don’t!”

“How would you know how I feel?” Dean asked.

“You fucking cheated on me, Dean!” I cried.

“I apologized for that!” He said.

“It doesn’t matter if you apologized! It wouldn’t matter if you fucking got down on your knees and begged my forgiveness. You cheated on me, your true mate, for some fucking slut. If you loved me, why would you do that?”

“We’ve had this conversation, Y/N,” Dean said. “I’m not going to repeat myself.”

“Oh yes, because that must be so hard for you, remembering the times you had with her. With Diana. Well, sorry. Those memories must be so painful for you, given I ripped out her heart and tore open her throat.”

Dean growled, pushing me back against the bathroom mirror, my head slamming into the glass, cracking it. I groaned as I felt shards of glass poke at my scalp, my towel falling off my shoulders as I braced my elbow on the counter.

“Don’t talk about her like that.”

I laughed sinisterly, vision beginning to dot as I felt blood trickle down from my head to the back of my neck. “Oh, Mr. Winchester. Always the hero. Bet you felt pretty shitty not being able to save her in time.” I smirked. “She was so pathetic. All sniveling and whimpering. ‘Oh, please don’t kill me! Please!’” I mocked. Dean snarled, hand gripping my throat as he bashed my head back into the mirror, this time, a shard of glass found its way into my scalp, a gasp slipping past my lips at the blinding pain ripping through my skull.

“Don’t fucking talk about her like that!”

I used the last of my strength to kick out at him, leaning forward enough to reach up and grab the shard of glass from my skull. I whimpered as a particularly bad cramp hit, and I brought the glass out in front of me to look at it, blood dripping down my hand. I looked up at Dean, horror written across his face as he looked at me.

“Oh my… Y/N, I’m so sorry… I… Oh god, baby.”

He rushed towards me, hands cupping the back of my head as he gently bent my neck down, inspecting the wound. 

“Shit,” he muttered. “Okay, baby. We gotta get you back to the infirmary.”

“No,” I whined. “I don’t want to. I don’t want to do this anymore.”

“Y/N, please,” he whispered.

“No, Dean. You don’t understand!” I said. “I don’t want to do this anymore!”

Tears pressed behind my eyes, and I gripped the bathroom counter until my knuckles burned. I leaned my head against Dean’s chest, listening to his heart, trying to match my breaths to the steady beat. 

“I don’t want to, Dean. I wish we could go back… do this all over again. Maybe then I would’ve been good enough for you.”

I heard him swallow, and I heard his heart skip a beat before picking up speed. He took a deep breath, and I waited for him to say something. Anything.

Instead, he lifted me up bridal style, a whimper all I could muster as my abdomen screamed at me, and he swiftly carried me out into the hallway.

***

“Your stitches ripped on your shoulder,” Sam murmured. He gently peeled away the rest of the gauze and picked up a scalpel, tearing at the rest of the stitches to start over. “We’re going to have to do this again.”

I stayed silent, eyes trained on the opposite wall. I felt weak, limbs heavy as I leaned back against Dean’s chest, his arms wrapped lightly around my waist to keep me sitting up. My eyes began to flutter, until the heat became too uncomfortable, and I tried to shrug out of Dean’s grasp.

“Hey, stop,” he muttered. “We’re almost done.”

Sam had put a few staples into my head after cleaning the cut and retrieving any glass from it. He checked the stitches on my abdomen first, and then my shoulder, and I barely winced as he threaded the needle in and out of my skin.

“Wanna sleep,” I slurred, vision going foggy. I knew something was wrong, and I hated to admit it, but Dean was right. This heat was killing me. 

My lips slightly raised.

“Okay, all done,” Sam said. He set down the needle, looking at Dean over my shoulder. I saw him shake his head lightly, shoulders sagging as he backed away. Dean kept a hand on me as he walked over to my side, lifting me up into his arms.

“Let’s get you back,” he said.

“Where?” I asked, head lolling onto his bicep.

He hesitated for a moment. “I hope you understand, Y/N. This is for your own good, the nesting. Sam thinks we’re almost done and then we can let you out. But… you need to stay in the dungeon for now.”

I scoffed. “Great. I’m going to die a prisoner.”

“You aren’t going to die.” Dean gritted his teeth. He made his way into the dungeon, setting my down on the mattress as I squirmed. He turned away from me, walking back to the door.

“Where are you going?” I called. He froze, head slightly turned towards me as he swallowed. 

“I’m not going to be in here with you anymore,” he said quietly.

I tensed, brow furrowing. I suddenly was wide awake again, and I swallowed the bile in my throat as I cupped my elbows, bringing my arms into my chest tightly. “You’re leaving me alone in here?”

Dean sighed, scratching the back of his neck as he turned to face me. “Y/N-”

“I thought you said we had to be together! That in order for me to get better, we have to nest together! You’re leaving me alone in here, to what? Die? Rot? I mean, Jesus, Dean! I’m on my fucking death bed. You’re going to leave me here to die alone?”

“Please don’t make this harder than it needs to,” Dean said.

“Don’t make it harder? You’re joking right?” I scoffed, suddenly feeling a buzz in my veins. I felt my eyes burn brighter, the anger beginning to return.

I was turning back.

Dean’s expression changed, and he held out his hands slightly. “Y/N, you need to try to calm down. You’re going to spiral again.”

“So?” I laughed. “I don’t care.”

I bounced onto my haunches, tilting my head as I licked at my fangs. “Leave me here, then. I always figured I’d die alone anyway. If it wasn’t at the end of a gun or with an empty bottle in my hands, figured it’d be by a heat gone awry.” 

“No, Y/N-”

“Goodbye, Dean! I hope you find another Omega! I hope she’s everything you ever wanted and more. Although, she may be hard to find. Because surely if your true mate isn’t enough, how will anyone else be? Well. I guess Diana may have been. Too bad I killed her before you had the chance to properly mate.” I shrugged, giving a mock frown. “My bad.”

“Look, you’re not dying, okay? You’re going to stay in here and nest, and I’ll come back in the morning.” He walked towards me again, reaching behind me to grab something. I heard the rattle, and before I knew it, he had gripped my wrist and clasped a shackle to it.

“Dean!” I hissed.

I kicked out at him, using my free hand to grasp at his face. He slapped my hand away, shoving me down on the bed, using his knee to keep me down. I screamed in pain as he pressed his knee into my bullet wound, and I felt my shoulder pop as he pulled my other arm up, shackling that one as well. Tears leaked from my eyes as I yanked at the chains, and I screamed in fury.

“Don’t lock me in here, Dean! Please!”

“Omega, please. This is hard enough as it is. I’m sorry. But it has to be done,” he whispered. I shook my head.

“No, don’t lock me up. Don’t treat me like another prisoner. Please!”

He bent down to kiss my forehead, before getting up to leave. 

“This is for your own good,” he said firmly. I cried as he pushed the shelves together, and I flinched at the sound of the door closing. I bit my lip to stifle my scream as I heard the door lock, and I finally loosened my joints dejectedly as I heard his footsteps recede, realizing I was going to spend my last few hours chained up in a dungeon.

But I guess that’s how Omegas should be treated anyway, right?


End file.
